Jacob xx Leah
by SweetHersheyKisses
Summary: Twilight Alternative!. Jacob finds out where his heart actually lies, Who does he love?. Will he help leah find a happy ending? finding one himself or will he settle for Renesmee. Will Leah ever be happy?.. READ!, Dramatic twist!.
1. Preface, Read first

**Fanfiction- Jacob &+ Leah.**

**-What was Meant to be. ****[Jacob xx Leah]**

**(Leahs Point of view.)**

This part of the fan book is my alternative, written in Leahs POV obviously. The main idea of the chapter is to show how Jacob falls for Leah instead of renesmee, but before he finds out his binding love for Leah he stays with Renesmee because she was a part of Bella. Bella becomes a vampire but does Jacob risk everything to stay with his 'natrual enemy' or does he admit that he loves Leah to himself, although there is a twist which will mean that Leah might actually get a happy ending or will she? :P. You shall have to see.....

Starts of from the end of Chapter 13 Pg 267 (- Book 2- Jacobs book) -'good thing I got a strong stomach'. (Breaking Dawn). As Seth, Leah and Jacob are about to sleep Leah gets second thoughts about protecting Bella (she is still pregnant, and the rest of the pack are trying to kill bella & her baby).

**Preface.**

**I needed to get out, I needed to be free from Sam. If Jacob (yes, the little leech lover) could leave Sam's stupid pack then I am going to leave, I am fed up of Emily's and Sam's stupid happiness, I hope they enjoy a long and miserable life together (like I care either way!). Being a female wolf is the worst thing I have ever been through, I had to cut my hair off short, when I loved it long. No one had power over me to do that. My identity was at crisis, I didn't even know who I was anymore, my future, my life had been lost. So I guess I have a half brother or something crazy like that?, figures. I have to suffer thanks to them. The Quilette pack make me sick, they read my mind and get into my thoughts as if I was a book, well I am not a book. I may be a super freaky gigantic wolf, but I am still half human!. Dont I get some human rights here?.**

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	2. Chapter 1 Change of thought

**SweetHersheyKisses; x**

Chapter 1. -Change of thought.

_''I think we can keep Bella safe'',_ Jacob mumbled in his thoughts.

''_Shes not your responsibility anymore'', _I said, not even thinking about it until I realised I was right.

''_Whats that supposed to mean?'',_ Jacob hissed violently in his head.

''_Ow, miagrane'',_ I yelped in annoyance, like how could Jacob love someone who didn't love him back, how stupid of him to go a protect those stinking bloodsuckers!. What a freak. Jacob growled, standing up onto his four paws. I mimiked him, growling again.

_''Can you atleast keep your thoughts to yourself?!'', _Jacob growled, crouching into an attack position.

''_Why is it because they are true'', _I sarcastically snarled, dodging Jacob's extended claw. ''_missed'',_ I laughed in my head, I actually hated this so much, My thoughts were supposed to be mine alone.

''_Then change Leah'', _Jacob howled.

_''Hello Pervert, I am not doing it infront of you, besides if you change then it can even the playing field'', _I attempted a wolfishy grin through my big snarly teeth. As a wolf why did I look so ugly?. Jacob's husky laugh hummed in his throat before he turned to sprint into the trees.

_''you shouldn't be so nasty Leah, maybe then Jacob would like you as a friend. Your both so ignorant'', _Seth rolled over on the floor, sniggering.

''_Shut up'', _I said before dashing into the woods before changing. Luckily, I remembered to tie a denium skirt, underwear and a t-shirt to the cord around my leg. Once I was merly human I sprinted back into the small clearing we had made to sleep, where Jacob was already waiting with his hands bauled up leaning against a tree. His torso showing off his poser muscles, he wore a pair of black joggers.

''Right so what the hell Leah?'', Jacob staggered, leaning away from the tree. He was next to me in two strides.

''It feels so good that you aren't in my brain, its nice when you feel your own emotions instead of feeling like a love sick puppy!'', -I hissed thinking of something sarcastic to say-'' Hey wait, its kind of cliché isn't it, dog'', I grinned trying to remember the last time I had been able to clean my teeth. Luckily it was only this morning. Ew, I would get major dog breath. I laughed again.

''Shut up Leah, your even worse than I am. Your always obsessing over Sam and his instructive ways to keep you in line!. Well then get used to it, because if you want to be in this so-called pack then I will be feeling alot of this because I know Bella can change her mind, I just know it'', Jacob started to tremble violently.

''Don't kid yourself, you half child, half discusting beast!'', I shrieked feeling annoyed, how dare he say that. I was way over Sam. Jacob started to tremour more as I snarled at him vicously.

''Why are you even here?, shouldn't you go and get crushed by a house like the wicked witch from the Wizard of Oz?, or go and apply makeup like the vein selfish girl you are'', Jacob snarled, Seth weined, as I growled. That stung.

''You know what, I ask myself the same question. Why am I here?. Maybe because I don't want my crazy love sick friend to die and to Oh, maybe keep my brother from getting killed. He is just a kid'', I mumbled, turning away from his glower. Seth growled sitting up.

''Shut up Seth'', Jacob grumbeled, Seth walked with his head ducked down through the trees. A moment later Seth walked out of the shadows.

''First thing is that, I am not deaf, I can here you talk about me Leah and you and I both know thats not true'', Seth explained taking Jacobs flanks.

''Your flanking him?, what about your sister?'', I growled, feeling a little betrayed. He should be sticking up for me, I was his flesh and blood.

''Maybe because his sister is a cruel selfish person that only thinks of her self'', Jacob jabbed, grinning victoriously to himself.

''I am not selfish, Why does everyone say that?'', I hissed, as my heart felt like it was breaking. Now that was cruel.

''You think about yourself all the time, don't you think that its hard on me too?, I know you suffer with your new life now but you have to learn to accept it, and get over it. Just like I did', Jacob winked at Seth, of all the betrayers in the world.

''You think I can accept something that wasn't even supposed to be mine to accept?. How would you feel if you couldn't be a mother to you own kids? and if you had to watch the guy you loved fall in love with someone else? but you already know that because you have to listen to my thoughts like I have to listen to your thoughts. Like get over yourself!, she loves a leech!, she is having his leechey baby!. Now both of you, shut up I am going to sleep'', my voice started to break, I walked out into the bushes before they could see me cry.

I hated showing emotion, stupid boys!. I changed quickly, listening out for their thoughts, My mind came up empty. Good, I hope they would stay human. I jumped over the bushes, into the clearing. Laying my head my stupid freaky paws. Jacob was still human, sitting with his legs crossed and his eyes closed. Copy cat Seth was copying his position. I snorted at them, Jacob looked up.

''We thought we would be nice and give you your own thoughts'', Jacob sarcastically smiled, closing his eyes again. I poked my tounge through my massive mouth before closing my eyes to sleep.

Whilst I was sleeping, I searched for something holding me in La Push in my dreams, nothing was keeping me here anymore, besides Jacob and my family. My dreams spiraled out of control, I wanted to be human, not just half human but a pure human. I wanted a family, a future. Instead my life was never begining and never ending, the only future I had was to be a wild wolf, running around after Bella and her vampire family. What a life I was building up for myself, It wasn't really a life. It was an insomnatic nightmare...

**SweetHersheyKisses;x**

Read the next chappy x


	3. Chapter 2 Realisation

**SweetHersheyKisses;x**

**Chapter 2- Realisation.**

This morning I woke up with a dry throat, and a chest pain in the place where a small organ called the heart was meant to be. My dream had proved to me that sleeping was pointless if I was going to rethink what I had just dreamt, I should of just stayed awake.

''Leah?, get over here!'', Jacob growled from a distance. I trudged over to where I could smell Jacobs scent.

Jacob was standing over a Seth, still human. I growled, in an attempt to say 'whats wrong'. How perfetic, I couldn't even speak for myself!.

''Your silly brother tried climbing a tree and broke his arm, but don't worry hes healing quick'', Jacob rolled his eyes. I growled at Seth, how stupid of him. Why the hell would Seth climb a tree and break his arm. Luckily he was a wolf.. otherwise I would have sent him home by now. Probably in a stretcher.

''It wasn't my fault that the tree was so weak'', Seth wined.

''Techincally it was your fault for climbing the tree, maybe you should loose weight', Jacob sarcastically remarked.

''Because I wanted to get a freking fruit?', Seth shouted, wincing as his arm protested.

''I am off to see Bella now, when I get back we will discuss the permiter'', Jacob grinned running full pelt through the trees, I yelped.

''Jealous'', Seth remarked as I growled. I decided that It was time to quickly change back to a human, so I can get used to having two legs and a mouth to speak with. Besides I had no reason to be quiet, Jacob was gone now, I laughed devilisly. I skipped hapily into the trees, were I had left my clothes last night and changed.

''Thats so much better!'', I whistled quietly.

''Why are you so happy'', Seth wined again from a distance. I walked bare footed through the trees, feeling the moss on the skin of my human feet.

''Maybe because you are in pain, now zip it and heal'', I commented, looking up the the mornings sky.

'Actually, I am right about healed'', Seth mumbled, jumping to his feet.

''And no climbing anymore trees, mom would kill me if you come back in a shoe box''.

''Who says I will'', Seth grinned grabbing hold of a near by tree.

''I do!'', I pulled his arm off the tree, pushing him onto the ground.

''just because your Jacob's beta doesn't mean you can control me', Seth struggled against my restraining hands.

''I am not second in command or anything like that, nobody owns me'', I growled pushing harder onto his shoulder.

'Ow!', Seth protested as a musical snap sounded from his shoulder. I winced pulling my hand away instantly. I had forgotten that I was a wolf and was capable of snapping bones like they were pencils. What happened to fighting with your brother and coming out with just a scratch?. Seth screams filled the air, until they died down to groans.

''Who are you!'', Seth riveled in agony.

''I am so sorry Seth, I forgot'', I begged for forgivness. Why did I have to break his shoulder blade. I hate being a wolf.

''Save it, your to spiteful, no wonder why Sam's pack despised you'', Seth got up, cradeling his shoulder and arm carefully sitting back down on a pile of moss. I watched him in shock as I started to think of the posibilities of running now before it was too late. All I wanted to do in the 'old pack' was to belong and to prove that I wasn't just needed to protect and destory the enemy but because I was actually wanted in the pack. I sat down where I was standing, wincing as I sat on a tree branch, that was probably destroyed when Seth broke the tree in half. Didn't anybody want me in the pack because they actually cared?.

''Seth I am sorry, Its just that I don't realise anymore'', I sulked, getting up from the mossy floor, crouching beside Seth.

''Thats a stupid excuse, the rest of us realise that we can break a rock with a poke'', Seth grumbled, wincing as his shoulder blade protested to heal.

''I am not like the rest of the pack am I Seth'', I hissed, staring him down.

''No, your the one with the big gob'', Seth grinned, flinching as he tried to hide the pain his shoulder caused, I laughed slyly at his pain.

''Shut up and heal Seth'', I groaned, standing to kick a rock through the trees. I stubbed my toe and felt nothing. It felt wrong. When I knew I was human, I used to scream as pain was inflicted on my toes but now that everything has changed, all I feel is the pain of my heart ripping even more. My mind thought about jacob, every second I waited for him to return I was thinking about him. It was kind of cliché that he is going through the same thing that I went through, How could Jacob stand for this?. How could Bella use him and why the hell could I not stop thinking about him!. Jacob was supposed to be my friend, yeah I admit we had flaws but I never would ever hurt him. A part of me wanted him to be hurt, the selfish part of me. I wanted to show others what it felt like to have your heart ripped out for every one too see. Jacob loves Bella... Bella loves the leech. I loved Sam (yes, loved meaning past tense!), Sam loves Emily. Its the same sort of story, accept I am the one with the no happy ending...

Leah the loner...

''Why are you so uptight Leah, I know you, not just your thoughts but your my sister, we grew up together!', Seth shrieked, emphasising the word sister. From now on, I decided that we are not related.

''I don't like being here'', I mumbled stubbing my toe, trying to feel the pain I felt when I knew everything was normal, when I was human. I felt nothing, no stabbing pain, no cry that would seep from my lips, nothing. That was not normal. I wanted desperatly to be human.

''I think we all know that Leah'', Seth's acidicly tone made me flinch. He never spoke like that before.

''Well Jacob shouldn't put up with this, its not fair. I know whats its like, how can he stand and look her in the eye and say he still loves her when he knows that he is going to get hurt, she loves him Seth, she loves a stinking leech and that stinking leech and its family are the ones were are risking our lives to protect!'', I felt the anger build up from toes to my skull

''Jacob is our brother, we do everything to protect our brothers'', Seth sounded more like Sam, I cussed frowning at him.

''Is that Sam's line or yours?'', I stared longer then necessary at a bird swoping down, protecting its young. My heart started to rip, why couldn't I have children?. Its nature for crying out loud!. Why did everything have to be taken away from me, my first love, my reason to stay sane and my future with children involved. The world was not meant to have creatures like us, especially the stinking _leeches_. If the Cullens didn't come back, then I would be human.

''Why have you got a big problem with Sam, you should know that he feels darn rotten about what he did to you, he can't help that he imprinted on Emily, shes our second cousin'', Seth pointed out as if he was a genius rubbing their knowledge into a neandathol.

''I know that, but she should of thought about that when she was hurting her second cousin'', I smiled sarcastically, quickly hiding the quick stomach jab.

''Imprinting is simple Leah, didn't you learn anything in the pack, imprinting means that we are subected to the persons desires, brother.., protector,... sister ... lover..whatever.'', Seth stabbed a knew hole at my chest. I tried hard to forget that.

''I don't care Seth, go hug a tree or something, do what ever you do to keep you away from talking to me'', I paced up and down the clearing, hoping for a clearifying thought to get rid of Jacob, I had jacob on the brain. I mean he is my friend, I am not going to sit back and watch him hurt. He may be annoying at times, but you never watch a friend in pain, even though a selfish part of me wanted him too. So he could actually appreciate my side, just a little. The pain you feel, when you see that the person you love, is loved by someone else and your love gets thrown out, unrequited?. When you watch the gaze between them, the very gaze that you used to share with him. When you know that you desperatly love him, and that he was supposed to be the one. The one that takes your very breath away, and is always there whenever you need them.

''I am not used to seeing you like this, are you sure your hormones have actually stoped Leah'', Seth grinned, wincing again.

''Seth, you will understand one day''.

''Well, to be honest I think you like Jacob, because why else would you be jealous'', Seth's lips quirked into a grin.

''Oh'', My throat exploded into raw laughter, now that was funny.

'Why are you laughing, I am serious. Your cheeks are red'', Seth grinned, stopping my airway.

''I do not like Jacob, hes just my annoying friend'', I said in a flat tone.

''Then why are you blushing?'', Seth stood, trying to flex his arm. I eyed him suspiciously, why did he have to say that. Its not true,... Is it?

''I am probably getting hot or something'', I said acting flustered.

''Hello, we don't get hot anymore, we remain like a boiler all the time, your just blushing because your jealous that Jacob loves Bella because secretly you like him, you just don't know it yet'', Seth simplified, leaving me mortified.

''Seth, until you know what your talking about, I suggest you don't speak at all'', I growled.

''Great, my own sister wants me to become a mime, I am feeling the love'', Seth sarcastically sniggered, doing the 'lock up the mouth, throw away the key gesture'.

''Do you want me to break the other shoulder blade?'', I frowned, kicking a rock through the forest walls. Footsteps approached the clearing, I froze crouching into a protective crouch infront of Seth. I eyed the walls of the forest quickly, checking for visiting leeches or the Quilette pack. I braced myself to pounce, as Jacob walked through the clearing.

I pounced forward, not realising it was Jacob, I changed into the grey wolf, aiming for Jacobs throat....

**SweetHersheyKisses;x**

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	4. Chapter 3 Puzzle peices

**SweetHersheyKisses;x**

Chapter 3-Puzzle peices.

''OWIE!, Leah its just me!'', Jacob yelled as my paws restrained him to the ground. I released him quickly, knowing it was Jacob and I was too fast for him to move out of the way, I sniggered looking down at a pile of shredded clothes. Great, I would have nothing to wear, and I am not going Adam and Eve style. Jacob took off his shirt, one which I hadn't realised he was wearing and handed it to me. His shirt looked long enough to wear as a dress, Jacob must be happy to show off his muscles, he always wore no shirt, I wonder why today was an acception. I had never thought how wonderfully muscular Jacob was, until I was appraising his muscles with my eyes. To be honest, I liked what I saw. I trotted off into a bush, changing and slipping his grey cotton t-shirt on. Luckily, nothing was showing, accept only I would have no underwear.

''I am soo sorry Jake!'', I begged, looking at Seth mimicking Jacobs actions.

''Sure sure'', Jacobs face dropped into a sad morners face.

''She's insane I tell you, she broke my shoulder blade!'', Seth faked a wince, and grinned.

''Stop being such a cry baby'', Jacob mumbled, his bottom lip quivering.

''Let me guess, Bella has poped already?'', I said sarcastically.

''No'', Jacob growled, giving me the impression that he wasn't looking for a conversation, but for comfort. I wasn't good at being a shoulder to cry on, and at the moment, neither was Seth. I hid a giggle.

''Then what Jacob'', I asked bored of the subject. My voice was toneless.

''Shes getting sicker, and sicker everyday but they, they... made her drink blood, and she liked it'', Jacob groaned, as his voice broke.

''She drank blood?'', I gasped as the idea poped into my head but that would mean that she was a vampire, I growled.

''Yeah'', Jacob bit his lip.

''The treaty Jacob, we are going to have to stop her, I hate to say this, but Sam is right and if she is going to kill others for blood then we have to stop her, they have broken the treaty!'', I shrieked word vomit. Jacob howled, letting out a fierce husky growl. His body hurtled forward, running straight ahead of me, I didn't know what to do, I froze in the heat of the moment. Jacobs hands pushed me, restraining me against a bulky accient looking tree, My head hurtled towards the trunk, smaching with a load bang. I shriked in horror as Jacob held me there, shaking.

''The treaty is dead Leah, unless you want your tounge in your mouth I suggest you shut the hell up, and if you dare touch her then I will make hell be the last thing you will want to see'', Jacob shouted at me, as my breathing accelerated. His grip tightened, my arms felt like they were about to break.

''Ow, Jacob, your hurting me'', My protest made him grip tighter, as traitor tears leaked from my eyes. My heart felt heavy, and in the bottom of my shoes.

''um, Jake man, let go, your going to change'', Seth placed a hand on Jacobs shoulder, tugging as hard as he could. Jacob wouldn't budge. Jacobs arms were quivering, shaking the tree, Seth and me at the same time, not only was jacobs tight shivering arms shaking, but my fears shoke my whole body. Every scream, every tear that seeped out of my body, made him grip tighter, I pushed against him, but his alpha strength was to strong. Jacob threw me onto the ground, making my left knee scrape along the ground, causing a gush of blood to flow freely. Jacob smashed his fists into the tree trunk, the tree trunk went hurtling towards another tree, destroying the second tree. Jacobs image was blurred through my streamy eyes. Not only was my vision blurred, but Jacobs shivering took on a mind of its own, causing my own fear to multiply. I scopped myself up quickly, feeling the ripping sensation rip through me, I was going to change and I was going to hurt something. I ran full speed into the trees, running as fast as I could. Until, I exploded.

I had to get away from there, I had to go quick. I had never seen that side of Jacob before, I felt as if my life was in danger. Running as a grey wolf through the forest, was weird, every part of my ached, inculding my pea sized heart. My heart wasn't capable of being in such a position. I entered the border line to La Push, thinking about packing my bags and leaving forever but would Sam catch me?, what happens if my mother won't let me go?. I froze on the spot for a second, constantly looking around me and for the voices in my head. Why did I have to cry infront of Jacob, I promised myself when Sam hurt me to never make myself feel that type of pain again. Footsteps started to approach my breakdown, but my legs were unable to move. Every part of me wanted to keep fighting, but something held me there.

''Leah'', Sam's voice called from behind me, I turned getting ready to pounce. His voice made me flinch, the soreness around my arms made me wimper loudly.

''Are you hurt'', Sam asked, slowly approaching. I shook my head, backing away.

''Its okay, you don't need to run from me Lee'', Sams old nickname made me yelp again, why was I so vunerable. Sam took off his long parka Jacket placing it infront of me, I guess I would have to speak to him. I hesistated before grabbing the coat and running back into a bush to change. What happens if I couldn't change, would I, should I. I was always the one having problems changing back into a human when I was so upset and angry. I took three deep breathes, as I turned back into myself again. I heaved on the heavy parka and walked back to find that Sam was waiting patiently in the bushes for me.

''What happened to you?'', Sam said quickly, jumping forward to look at the red marks on my neck and arms.

''I fell, I should heal soon, It doesn't hurt'', I lied trying not to flinch at Sams hard touch. I wanted to pull away from him, and never let anyone touch me again.

''These are Jacobs aren't they?'', Sam growled, making me jump.

''Nope'', I hoplessly lied, he saw through me easily.

''Why did he hurt you?'', Sam's eyebrows rose, like he cared one bit.

''Why do you care, you hurt me too. No, actually, you left me broken'', I growled, eyeing him evily. I couldn't take the sight of his face, I wanted to smash his face in like paper doll.

''You know Sam? I cant even look at you right now, I'm leaving'', I turned to leave, but Sam's hand restrained me from leaving, fear started to grow in the pit of my stomach, I couldn't bare being hurt like that again.

''You can stay you know'', Sam's voice strained.

''Don't even ask that Sam, you know what, every time I look at your face, all I want to do, is smash it right in'', I pulled his hand from my arm, stripping down, until I was naked. I threw the parka back to Sam, and exploded again. I didn't know how much time I had, I needed to grab a fresh pair of clothes from my old home, dodge re-uniting with my mother and getting back to Jacob. I can't Seth with Jacob, he was dangerous, besides, haven't I been trying to convice myself that helping Jacob out was a good thing?. What ever happened to todays progress.

_''Leah, Jacob feels bad about what happened to you, please come back''_ Seths voice sounded around my head.

_''Butt out Seth, I am going home to get some clothes, thats all'',_ I groaned back.

_''Can you bring me something please?'', _Seth asked in my head.

_''I am not a delievery service, get it yourself''_ I said, whilst climing up a window pipe on my small house. I wouldn't be able to fit through the window without smashing it, I better turn human. I looked around me, trying to see if anybody would see me, nobody was in sight of the house. I turned human, slipping quickly through the window into my old and familar shack of a house. My hands dug through cuboards, how vein of me. I was digging for something nice and smart to hide the bruises I would have for a few hours. The clothes would probably turn into peices of shredded cotton anyway. My hands quivered and held up a brown silky laced tank top that I had been saving for a special occasion. I probably wouldn't get to wear it any other day of the year, my life seemed to be a endless waste. At the bottom of my draw I found a pair of black jeans. I applied the material to my naked body after finding some clean underwear, it was hard finaciacally being a wolf, I couldn't afford to keep buying clothes that I ripped when transforming. I looked into the mirror, studying the familiar strangers face. My face was riddled with dirt, I couldn't even remember the last time I washed. I sneaked my way down towards our tiny, cupboard shaped bathroom, listening for any signs that my mom was home. So far so good, my mother was probably round Billys or at the council, discusing the best strategy of killing a human that was in love with a leech. I undressed again, jumping into my shower and scrubbing my skin as if it was pealing. I flinched with every touch of my red skin. I shampoo'ed my short hair, scrubbing harder than neccessary. I wonder how long it would be to grow back, I loved my hair and thanks to Sam I was forced to chop it all off. I tried to visualise how long my wolf hair would be when it was longer, I would probably look like a running hay stack. Once I was washed, I put my clothes back on, and went back to my bedroom to stare at the strange reflection in the mirror. The girl had short cropped hair that curled and stuck out everywhere. Her complexion was clear, and her skin was sun kissed. Her brown eyes showed more than their colour, but the hidden pain too. Her lips were a peachy colour, that resembled my face perfectly. I sighed pulling a brush through the entangled knots in my brunette hair. I decided to do something smart with my hair, consuming the amount of time I had before I was forced to go back. It was still the morning, so I had to use up most of the day. I dried my hair straight and then decided to curl the front part of my bob with ringlet curls, once the curls were perfect and pinned back, I sorted my fringe. Now that I was done with my clothes, my hair and my shower I cleaned my teeth mehanially, finally. I wouldn't get 'wolf breath'. My feet shuffled out of my room quickly and down the stairs, I seeped through the hall, and into the small box living room. I am not climbing out of the window again, I thought grabbing everything edible from the fridge, stuffing it into a large plastic bag. I was starving and I am not eating deer again. I heard the front door open, I froze. Slamming the fridge and heading for the back door. It was lucky I grabbed eggs, I fancied a nice fry up. I sprinted through the forest, running past a familar tree and a familar path.

''Leah!, I am so sorry!'', Jacob cried from no where. I stopped to turn and look around, I couldn't see him anywere. Was I imagining things?.

''Jake, its fine, where are you?'', I called out, continuing to look around me. Jacob jumped out of a tree, landing awkwardly infront of me making me jump.

''Geez Jacob, you scared the crap out of me!'', I sighed in relief, secretly backing away.

''You have no idea how sorry I am, its just that when you said them things it made me mad, and I will control myself in the future, I promise'', Jacob closed the gap between us, as I tried to hide the ocasional _gasp gasp _from my lungs.

''Forget it Jake, I was out of order for saying that, and besides I brought edible food'', I changed the subject lifting the stolen bag of food.

''You know its all my fault Leah, and your a life saver, good food'', Jacob grinned showing the way into the camp they had made.

''Wow, you have done a lot since I was gone'', I mumbled walking into a man made camp sight. Leaves were made into thick braids for beds, I never knew that the guys could be so artisitc. They had already built a fire, and had it raging, so I decided to cook everyone food. Once the food was eaten Jacob was in the most weirdest mood.

''Its wolf time, I want to be on our guard and stick to being wolfs from now on'', He mumbled, avoiding our eye contact. I headed into the trees, feeling as if I wanted to kick myself for laying down everything that everyone didn't want to hear. But who could argue with the Alpha?. I dumped my clothes into the bush beside the camp, exploding into the same grey wolf. If only people knew how hard this was to be the only girl wolf in the pack, maybe they would understand, not only by reading my thoughts but by actually understanding through personal experience. I jumped over the bush, already hearing Jacobs thoughts and what he had been through today. I tried not to whine in the sympathetic agony that I felt for him. So much pain radiated from his mind, it felt hard not to go and hurtle myself of a cliff and hope for the best. How did he cope?. Seth met my glaze, sitting on a pile of pine needles. I could feel Jacob's emotions through Seth and Jacob, and to be honest, I understood why people wanted to kill themselves. The pain multiplied, as I felt the pain of all three of us, and it was killing me. Bella flashed through my mind continuously, her face, her laugh, her pain extending Jacobs pain. I whined and winced as I felt what he was feeling. A part of me wanted to hit Jacob with a shoe, but he was already dealing with so much, I couldn't bare to cause him anymore pain.

''_Leah, keep your thoughts to yourself, please',_ Jacob begged in his mind. The begging made me want to gag in pain. The feelings made me want to blurt out so much word vomit that I was greatful that I couldn't speak. It wasn't fair, Bella didn't deserve Jacob, and to top of my point, he didn't deserve to go through this pain. If I could find a way to end his pain I would, I would do anything in my power. I would give my life for him and for that moment on, I knew how I felt about him and I needed to get away from him, so I could be me, and feel what I want to feel and not what others feel. I needed to help his pain lessen, and help him move on but how?. I was a female wolf, and something was happening to me. My heart felt as if it was swelling, and I no longer saw jacob in the same way I always saw him but I couldn't help but feel a binding passion that I wanted to protect Jacob, to help him. How can he love a monster, that was killing him?.

''_Jealous because no one loves you!'',_ Jacob blurted out in his mind, making me howl in pain. How could he say that. How could he do this to me. I felt a tear roll down my gigantic wolf eyes. My heart felt as if someone was twisting it into a knot, renching at the strings. I couldn't do this anymore. I couldn't repair what was broken beyond repair.

''_I am sorry, I didn't mean it'', _Jacob said, with a unconvincing tone in his head but it was too late, the damage had already been done. I wanted to make my chest stop aching, I wanted to make sure that I died for good and that nobody could save me. I was half dead already. I often used to wonder if I could ever find the strength to kill myself, but right about now, I would do whatever it takes to finally cross that bridge.

_''I'm sorry guys but I am leaving for good. Don't come and find me, I am not Leah anymore. Jake, take care of Seth and Seth, don't tell mom where I am'',_ I gushed in my thoughts grabbing my clothes in my mouth and running as far away as I could. I hadn't thought this through clearly, but I had to be human to do it. I knew that Jacob felt what I was feeling, but I didnt care. I needed to get out, this was too complicated, even though I knew what was wrong, I was determinded not to think of it. I dashed into a tree changing, so that no one could find me. I ran as fast as I could, watching Leah clearwater disappear and the familiar stranger take place in my body. I had started to imprint with Jacob and wasn't going to admit it myself. All I long, I knew that this feeling for him had been deep down in the bottom of my raisin looking heart, I had been broken by many things before and I wouldnt admit to myself that I could be fixed. Seth was right, I was wrong. The burning sensation in my heart, started to cool as I blanked what had just happened out of my mind and I knew what was my next plan of action. I had to find Bella. I had to end Jacobs pain, in any way necissary....

**SweetHersheyKisses; x**

**(Read more and more and more!!)**


	5. Chapter 4 Salvation

**SweetHersheyKisses; x**

**Chapter 4 -Salvation**

As I trudged through the forest walls, I convinced myself, I had to do what was to be done. I had to save Jacob, even if he didn't want to be saved. I was the one who started the imprint, I was the one who was born to be Jacobs protector, sister or whatever he wanted me to be. It was about time I ended this. I knew roughly were the cullens vampire love shack was, but I never had chance to either set it on fire or demolish the contents. I despised the Cullens for taking Bella, I despised them for hurting Jacob- My Jacob. My fists bauled up at my sides, as the door was already open, and outside, waited Edward stinking Cullen.

''We have been expecting you'', Edward sighed, almost as if he was in pain. Good.

''I am not here for pleasantries'', I growled jumping up the last few steps.

''I know'', He sighed again.

''I am here to speak with Bella, this doesn't concern the rest of you'', I stood rigidly at the door, staring into his honey coloured eyes.

''We understand, but don't think were stupid. We are not leaving Bella in your hands'', Edward hissed back, blocking half the door. We stood quietly growling at eachother for a minute until a quiet feeble voice called to us.

''Let her through Edward'', Bella said, sounding in pain. I laughed sarcasically grinning.

''But''.

''Let her through'', Bella interupted.

I pushed myself through, not touching his cold and hard looking skin.

''Leah, Its nice to see you'', said a small half hidden girl, which was probably Bella. She was being cradelled by Edwards super crazy blonde vampire freak of a sister. I hissed at her.

''Well I am here to warn you'', I stopped infront of her, checking my flanks. I seemed surrounded.

''Warn away'', Bella sighed clutching hold of her stomach. I flinched at the sight of the massive bulge.

''How could you do this to Jacob, you need to let him go or you are going to push him to his insanities!. I should know and besides, Bella I know its too late to save you now but we used to be friends and I thought that when you befriended Jacob, you would look out for him and care for him and do whats best for him but instead you selfishly gobble him to your side whilst you claim you want this life. Its killing him slowly, I don't know how much more he can take'', I babbled on.

''I know how much this is killing him, I know so badly, I cannot let him go. I just can't. What happens if I tell him to leave?, what would he do then. Remember the wedding, he went absolutly nuts and I don't want him to leave', Bella shifted her weight and continued 'We used to be friends?, I thought we were friends'', Bella sighed.

''Past tense'', I snarled at her.

''Some friend'', Rosalie sniggered, I growled at her until she shut up and went back to staring at her self in the glass windows. How vein.

''I don't think I want to tell him either, I mean how hearbreaking would that be'', Bella said with her voice full of the little acid she had left in her lifeless body. Edwards teeth snapped behind me, causing me to turn to stare him down. I backed away a little, creating free space between us.

'You don't want to let him go?, how selfish. If you don't let him go, then you will kill him in the end and I am the one who will have to pick up the peices', I flinched at the thought, staring back into Bella's eyes.

'What am I supposed to do?', She almost sobbed.

'Tell him that you will always be friends but you can't be near him anymore, and leave', I went straight to the point.

'Thats rude, telling us to move', Edward sniggered from the side of me, sitting back down to Bellas side.

'Face it Vampire, half human counts more than no human, If I were you, I wouldn't of come back', I turned to face him, growling instantly.

'Both of our existances are not normal, you should know that and the only reason whilst your here, well I think we know why don't we', the blood sucker said in a mocking voice.

'To protect a friend', I stated.

'An imprint', He laughed.

Bellas eyes met with mine for a minute, for the first time, I saw guilt. The room went quiet, before Bella spoke the words I wanted to hear.

'Were leaving, for good', Bella smiled at me. I wanted to grab hold of her and run away. A smile played at the corner of my lips.

''Good''- I said putting back on my hard face-''Its about time you end this, before anyone gets hurt'', I nodded, backing away slowly to the door.

''Leah'', Bella called, sitting up, with help from both Bloodsuckers.

''Yes'', I asked, still backing away

''I hope you find yourself again, and I hope that one day you can forgive me and be my friend again'', She said, breaking into a tearless sob.

''I am sorry Bella, its too late, I can't be your friend if this is the life you have choosen. We could try, but it simply wouldn't work'', I sighed walking faster to the door.

''You think I need saving?'', Bella asked, attracting my attention

''Yes more than you know, your giving away a human life. A normal life. I want to be normal Bella, but I can't. I didn't have the choice and I think you shouldn't either. The life you have taken is affecting you more than you know. That baby will one day become a blood sucking monster and on that very same day, you will have thrown away something that you can never get back and what many people in this world would dream of. What about my dad?, do you remember him. He will never be able to see me grow old, and because of what I am he would of never been able to see grandchildren. Don't you think that he would of wanted his life back if he could get it?'', I snarled.

''Im sorry'', Bella looked to the floor -if she could see the floor.

''You will never get it back'', I said, still backing away from the door. I turned my eyes onto Edwards sister, she seemed upset, almost as if she was agreeing with me.

''why do you have to leave?'', She asked, pained by my sentance.

''I can't take this anymore'', I mumbled, heading for the door.

''I guess I better call in the pitty party for Jacob, what a self righteous fool'', Bella laughed, as if her own bestfriend meant nothing. I probably wasn't meant to hear that. How could Bella be like this, but she wasn't Bella anymore. She was one of them...

''Goodbye Isabella Swan, have a nice life'', I said acidicly sprinting quickly out the door. If I spent another five minutes in there I would have snapped her neck. I ran fast into the forest, running as far as I could. I ran hopelessly for miles and miles, looking for somewere I could belong and look and feel atleast normal. I would eventually go back, I would make myself. I would check to see if she left, to see if he is safe and to see if Seth hasn't killed himself yet.

Time seemed to pass whilst I searched for something. I felt lost without La Push, I felt empty without understanding. I needed to find my safe house, I needed a new life, a fresh start.

**SweetHersheyKisses; x**

(I have wrote more,... Which is more intense.. Bare with me for a while, I have finals to study for so I haven't had much time to upload chapters. Please check, because I might have uploaded more.. Please review and tell me if it was good or if something needs to be improved. Thanks)


	6. Chapter 5 Missing Jacobs POV

**SweetHersheyKisses; x**

**Chapter 5 -Missing**

(I have wrote Jacobs Point of view up to a certain part, I will mention when the point of view has been changed. Thanks to LoveIt123 I got inspired and wrote Jacobs point of view for her leaving etc. Thanks for the inspiration! LoveIt123!!.)

Jacobs P.O.V.

Its not the same, my mind thought. Leah had been gone for three hours but something restless within me knew something wasn't right. It felt different with Leah gone, the group felt incomplete. I heard the memory of her voice in my head -in my human form. She was moaning like she usually did about how everything stinks that she was the only female Quilette wolf known to history. I never knew you could ever miss something so annoying.

''Jake, foods done'', Seth mumbled breaking my focus.

''Save a plate for'', I stopped feeling stupid. Leah was gone now, never coming back. Something about the thought of never hearing her rant on about everything, seeing her laugh and smile so bravely when she wasn't happy made me wince. I felt a tugging sensation burn around my heart. I chose to ignore the pain and focused on Seth's confused face.

''Save a plate for who Jake?'', Seth asked in a low tone.

''No one'', I mumbled pacing up and down the clearing. A feeling deep within my chest flowed around my body. I couldn't quite recognise the feeling I had.

''You mean Leah?'', Seth said.

''No!'', I said defensively. I stoped and thought about my reaction. Why would I just act like I was a kid denying I had a crush on someone?. I tried to forget about Leah for a while -it would help me focus on saving Bella.

''jeez Jake, what's wrong with you'', Seth laughed flipping some pancakes in Leah's stolen frying pan. I punched my arm quickly. I wasn't meant to be thinking about her!.

''Bella think of Bella'', I said under my breath which was far to low for Seth to hear. I stretched out taking a hand full of pancakes, stuffing them into my mouth quickly. Leah's proud laugh sounded all around me.

''Shut up Leah'', I said out of habit. I froze realising I just looked like an idiot.

''Jake what is going on with you?'', Seth said slamming the frying pan on the floor out of impatience. That was the problem with Seth, he was always impatient and hated not knowing what was happening -I thought he was just nosey.

''Didn't you hear it?'', I asked leaning forward.

''Hear you talking to yourself. Yeah I did'', Seth rolled his eyes before sitting on a log.

''I wasn't talking to myself'', I sulked immaturely.

''You was talking to Leah's ghost then?'', Seth laughed. I moved quickly smacking the back of Seth's head.

''Shut up'', I groaned sitting on the other side of the clearing.

''Ow Jake man, there was no need to give me a headache'', Seth moaned rubbing his temples. I sat still feeling the burning feeling again. I rubbed my chest quickly. Something felt missing -I had a feeling of being incomplete. A familiar smell wafted past my nose. I sniffed, remembering a musky lavender smell -Leah's smell.

''Fancy going on a hunt?'', Seth said wriggling his eyebrows in a challenge.

''No!'' I shouted to quickly. Seth will not hear my thoughts of Leah.

''Why?'', Seth sulked. I thought for half a second before answering.

''Because we have to separate business from leisure'', I smiled sarcastically -it always worked when my dad said it.

''You sound like Billy'', Seth laughed swinging his legs of the log. I smiled, it was dad words. I sat still for a minute, being unable to think of nothing besides Leah.

''Do you reckon she's okay?'', Seth asked rubbing his left temple.

''Yeah Leah will be fine, she has to be'', I said as if I meant it. A part of me wanted her to be all right. Usually I thought she could handle herself -she's a female wolf after all it wasn't like she couldn't defend herself against a full human. This time, I had the feeling that she was in pain and that she needed me. Strangely, I started needing her too.

''I meant Bella?'', Seth asked glowering at me.

''Yeah she's fine she's got vampward'', I mumbled daydreaming about Leah. What was happening to me?.

''You mean Edward?'', Seth corrected his new vamp-buds name.

''Yeah whatever'', I mumbled pacing again.

''Jake do you need me to call Billy?. You would never say that about Bella'', Seth said almost freaked out.

''Bella!'', I shouted quickly, I had forgotten that she was getting sicker by the minute. I was too busy thinking of.. of.. Leah. I started making my way to the other side of the clearing. I passed Seth and made my way through the trees.

''I know'', Seth sighed. I turned confused.

''And what is it that you know?. Is Bella okay?'', I said gasping and getting ready to run.

''Leah imprinted on you'', Seth said seriously.

''That can't be possible because that would mean that I had imprint...'', I stopped to think. Suddenly, I knew why I felt so incomplete and the reason why I missed her desperately. I needed her as much as she needed me but I ignored the truth and kept on fighting for Bella. Deep down I knew that a part of me loved her, I had always loved her. I just kept denying it for someone I could never have. She ran away from her own home because of me -I chased her away. I started hurting, feeling as if I was meant to help fix her.

''Leah'', I said breathlessly at the pain that clenched hold of my stomach. Guilt rattled through my bones. I ran hopelessly into the woods trying to pick up her scent. Where would she go?. Then I knew -The Cullen's.

I ran the way I usually ran towards the Cullen's vamp-shack and jumped over the long river. I charged my way up the stairs -the door was already left open for me.

''Where is she?'', I demanded looking around the room for her.

''She left'' Bella sighed sitting up from the sofa.

''I have to go find her'', I said quickly rushing back to the door.

''Jake, come see me before we leave'', Bella sighed her usual 'I'm-trying-not-t-cry-sigh'. I turned. My feelings might of changed but I will always love Bella as family. I knew that now.

''Bella your not going to cry on me are you?'', I said in a teasing brother-like way.

''No silly. I just want to see my best friend off before he finds his imprint'', Bella laughed as she sniffed away her tears.

''You know about that?'', I asked peering into her eyes. She still smelt human, her heart still head a rhythm.

''I'm not just a bloodsucking monster remember?. I do have a talent most like yours'', 'vamp-ward' spoke from next to Bella.

''Yeah whatever. Bella, I promise I will come back'', I smiled before dashing out of the door not caring about anyone flanking my back.

''She has to be out here somewhere'', I spoke looking side to side. Her smile flashed in my head. I ripped a plant from the ingrowing forest around the Cullen's house. Her scent, that's all I needed to be able to find her. I sniffed all around the perimeter of the house feeling desperate. My heart thudded in my chest. I panted and breathed as my breath became shallow. Almost as if I had been winded by a strong blow to the chest. My heart felt like it was crumbling. I wanted Leah, I needed Leah but most of all, I loved Leah. I searched helplessly through the forest, trudging desperately through puddles of mud. It started raining -even though I wouldn't get cold -I felt cold, lost and broken in half. As my heart ripped I knew I could search forever.

'She would be happier without you Jacob'', I said in a zombie like voice.

I searched for two days straight without sleeping, eating or drinking. All I could do was think of her. Just seeing her would make me whole again. But I knew what I needed -what I had to have.

…. But she was gone.

**SweetHersheyKisses; x**

(I am currently re-writing the other chapters... shall put them on in the next 48 hours!!! With any luck, Please bare with me!.)


	7. Chapter 6 Searching

**SweetHersheyKisses; x**

Chapter 7 -Searching. 

(Still Jacobs point of view.)

1 Year later. 

How can someone live without their heart?, who would of thought of attempting it. Oh how I wondered alone, so alone.

''Aren't you going to see Renesmee today?'', Billy asked interrupting my thoughts. I looked up at him without a smile -that same smile I lost when she left. I stayed around for my father and Renesmee, I settled for being her companion for I had imprinted with Leah and that imprint grew wilder each day, my love for Leah had burnt my heart. Her name murdered me, her disappearance weakened me.

''Maybe later'', I said miserably. Why have I stayed here?, my father has his new girlfriend now, some girl he 'bumped' into at the La push grocery store when he was doing the shopping when I was moping away in my room -not coming out for days at end. She left me degraded into this hell whole of my life.

''You need to get out Jacob, your driving me crazy with your moping", Billy nudged me in the ribs playfully, I looked down at him for a second and then looked back at the window.

"Maybe I need to get out, the forest will do me good actually", I turned about to walk away. What I wanted to say was ''Yeah, lets get out into the place that reminds me more of her, it wont hurt a bit!''.

"What about Quil and Embry?", Billy asked from beside me. I never knew Billy was so fast in his wheelchair these days. Sometimes, I couldn't help but hate his happiness with his new girlfriend. How can one person be happy, love is irrational, heartbreaking. Love was inner death, torment and suffering. I knew the true definition. Love was wanting something that you can never have and once you've fallen ill with the disease it was terminal. It slowly weakened you and takes everything away from you. Finally it kills you. Love is a disease.

"You know the pack all hate me besides, I don't know why I stick around this place where I get in the way or people don't want me", I shifted my stiff shoulders. I would find a way of getting a bigger bed -my bed was either made for children and classed as an adults or it was secretly a cardboard box.

''Your so grumpy Jacob, perhaps you need new friends. What about Bella?'', Billy tried to get past my legs, I sighed and moved out the way. He means Vampella?, Yep, she's a vampire now. Happy with her so called 'Vampward' and Cullen family.

''I'm going to the forest'', I strolled off out of the front door staring out into the Quilette land. I was no Quilette any more, I didn't transform into a wolf, It seemed like a century ago since I was that person, now, I was just a sad pathetic fool with half a heart. I found myself wondering back to the overgrown clearing that was once a place were my pack belonged. The trees had overgrown, the grass had taken over and it was dark in this miserable place. Maybe this is were I belonged?, maybe this could be the place that could relate to my feelings.

''Your such an idiot Jacob'', Leah's voice said in the clearing. I spun around wildly looking for her. What a fool, it was my memory of her preserved voice. It had taken me a year to get her out of my head, and she was back in my mind, causing me heart failure.

''I miss you Leah, more than you know'', I spoke into the clearing, sitting down onto the log Seth once sat down on and fell off. Oh Seth, I had been an idiot and demanded that he left me alone. He reminded me to much of Leah, I didn't need that. I would find a way to apologise eventually.

''Like I said, an idiot'', her laugh sounded around my head. She wouldn't want me -ever. She wouldn't think of me or come back to me. She is happier without you, and you know it Jacob.

''I know I'm an idiot but hey, I guess that's why you left. My life has been miserable Leah. I can't help this little part of me that hates you because you left me but I can't help but love you Leah!, Why are you doing this to me!, come back to me please, I beg of you Leah!. Just come home!", I said breaking down, falling to my knees. Liquid tears flowed down my cheeks. My heart tugged and tugged until it left me breathlessly broken and all I could hear was the sound of my heart ripping.

**SweetHersheyKisses; x**

**(Don't forget to read more!).**


	8. Chapter 7 Pain at Length

SweetHersheyKisses; x

Chapter 7- Pain at Length.

(still Jacobs Point of view.)

Two years Later.

Living in a body that was half dead wasn't so bad, after the past three years I had learnt how to numb my body and live each day as if it were for survival. I ate, drank, slept and breathed. I did what any other person would do but I was not a normal person. I was an 'ex Quilette wolf in an ex Quilette wolf pack'. Now, I was a nothing with no life and no meaning. What was once taken from me, will never return. Billy, had proposed to his new girlfriend and was preparing for their engagement party. I tried to at least get along with the tall brunette haired woman that was taking our house over and fake a smile every time they mentioned the 'W' word. Yes, I laughed at first when they said the 'W' word, she couldn't know that I was a wolf. She may have been refering to 'walkies' like dog owners. My feet kicked the isolated pebbles at the edge of the road that led down towards the cliffs and La Push beach. Maybe if I threw some pebbles into the sea I could recreate something I used to love doing for hours with my... um, friend -Someone that I would never forget.

I made my way down towards the beach knowing hopelessly that this was going to cause me issues, my heart started to throb madly as I stepped one foot onto the pebbles and sand. I walked slowly letting my long hair flap around in the wind. I had decided to grow my hair back -it was stupid, but if felt like I started to have control over something in my life. The waves washed slowly against the shore beating like a source of electrical current through a heart. I swallowed the hard lump in my throat, my legs were starting to shake. Maybe recreating a distant memory was a bad thing, I chickened out and turned around walking through the forest, searching for the same clearing. I had been visiting the clearing often, trying to grab hold of anything that could complete my heart, even though I was being irrational to myself. It would never be completed without the one thing that I wanted and needed.

_But she was gone!._

I found the clearing perfectly as if I was reading it off a map, it looked even more deserted, it wasn't even a clearing -more like a giant mass of greenery. I sat down on the same log after pushing myself through trees and thorny bushes. If I could feel the damage inflicted onto my skin, I wouldn't care. It wasn't as if I didn't feel pain. My heart had died -there was no worse pain then dying of the love disease. I sat feeling the wind flow through my hair and my fingers tense at the throbbing sensation that my crescent heart was creating. A rustling came from behind a couple of trees, my body tensed and quickly hid behind the bottom of the fallen down log. Usually, I shifted into my wolf form but I wasn't a wolf. I was a nothing. I waited watching the bushes moving and a small sun-kissed hand revealed itself. I stared intently trying to stop my loud nervous panting. I kept on watching, waiting for the rest of the person. My instincts were telling me to run far away but something kept me grounded there like a plant just been rooted to the ground to grow.

Another hand came from out of the bush, then a leg, and another until a small long curly haired brunette stepped out into my clearing.

SweetHersheyKisses; x

(read more! -I am currently stressing out over my Care course, so I have LOTS of coursework, so I will try to finish this story very soon.. I am writing the next chappie Tonight.. but will upload it in a few.. )


	9. Chapter 8 Like a dream

SweetHersheyKisses; x

Chapter 8 -Like a dream.

(_LEAHS POINT OF VIEW!)_

I brushed away the dirt on my jeans, climbing through masses of over grown grass wasn't easy as it looks. I patted my long wild curls gently feeling happy that I was able to grow my hair back without anyone telling me what to do. The last three years had been the most painful of my life and I admit, I was stupid for coming back here. I flinched staring round the clearing. It had only been three years since the day I imprinted and now I was weak enough to give in to my desires and come back. It had been hard, all I could do was think of him and say to myself ''Is he thinking of me?'' and ''He is better off without you Leah''. I sat down on the log in the distance. The memory of Seth falling of the log was like music to my ears. Oh Seth!, how I missed him dearly. I felt tears brim up into my eyes. I wasn't family wolf girl any more. I was just girl Leah who couldn't transform into a wolf (or just pretended she couldn't and gave up with it to escape the pain of being vulnerable). No more tears, I had promised myself all those many years ago, no more tears because tears were a weakness. In the last three years I had tried to live normally but the temptation of the wanting need to come home grew to much for me. My heart was weak and I hated myself for allowing the imprint!. How stupid, I should of left whilst I had the chance. Why was I even here?, its obvious that he's having a brilliant life?. Why ruin it for him -he's probably got Vampward's Bella. I had to do the right thing, I decided that long ago. Jacob was happier without me and I would do anything to keep him happy, so I would leave and feel the pain. I would do anything for Jacob. I began to turn and walk away but something rustled from behind me. I turned around putting my hand in my Jeans pocket. Dam I forgot to bring my pen knife. I looked around me quickly. I don't need a reason to turn into a wolf by my paranoia. There, the bushes rustled again. I turned around catching a glimpse of a shadow. My heart thumped against my chest.

''Are you lost?'', I familiar husky voice asked. My heart skipped a few beats at the familiar voice. I imitated one of my new friend voice, I made it too girlie.

''No I am just on an adventure trail'', I lied and laughed turning my face away. I knew that warm face, that long hair, that wide white teethed smile.

''Do you need help or something?. Not many people come to the reserve'', His voice was almost soothing. He didn't recognise me, good. I would leave, he seemed happy. He was grinning at me like a lost puppy, maybe he did recognise me.

''No I don't I told you I am here doing an adventure trial'', I said with my old attitude and a shrieking voice. Jacobs eyes peered suspiciously at me. The impact of looking at his face hit me. I wanted to melt in his arms and stare into his dark eyes forever. It would make the process of leaving harder.

''I'm sorry if I offended you'', Jacob sniggered walking closer. I hope he doesn't recognise me.

''Offend me?'', I sniggered like the old Leah. My fringe dropped over my face, I blew it out my way quickly trying to lower my eyes from his face.

''Forgive me for asking but what's your name?'', He walked to my side, sitting down on the end of the log.

''Katie'', I lied.

''That's a nice name. I'm Jacob'', Jacob smiled outstretching his hand for me to shake it. I nodded quickly turning my face away. I couldn't touch him and feel the soft heat of his skin. I had to leave. Why am I not leaving!.

''I better go, I have to get back to Port Angeles my friends will think I'm lost or something'', I laughed giving a girlie laugh to make my cover sound like another person. I wasn't exactly good at acting -Jacob must be blind or completely dumb.

''I know this will sound stupid but do you need a lift home?, I wouldn't like you walking an hours car ride away'', Jacob smiled again. His smile made my heart beat louder. An hours car ride with Jacob?, could I?.

''Um, I don't mind walking. I just have to go'', I began walking away but his warm hands grabbed hold of my wrist. I turned around trying not to look like I was nervously panting. I gazed into his eyes foolishly letting me melt inside them. That's when I remembered the pain of loosing him. I pulled away from him like no other fragile full human girl could.

''I'm leaving'', I stormed off walking back through the way I had came. Jacob was flanking me.

''Well why don't I walk with you?'', Jacob suggested calmly. Did he recognise me?.

''No don't be stupid you idiot', I sniggered again regretting my choice of words. Jacob almost jumped, I could see his fingers clenched into fists, his expressions in between shock and pain.

''I'm sorry, its just that I have to find a hotel first and its getting late, and a nice happy guy like you must have other things to do like look after your family and girlfriend and whatnot', I smiled falsely. It killed me to smile at him just before I had to leave him. I might as well find out as much as I could, for curiosity's sake but what happens if he was happy?, I can't blame him for moving on but would it make it worse for me having to hear how some girl could give him something I could never give?.

''Happy? Hardly'' Jacob snorted. A facial expression that I had never seen Jacob wear before set on his face like jelly mould. Jacob always had pride on his features, but now it was more of a fed up in pain look. So he wasn't happy?, great, I bet it was his girlfriends fault. I cussed quietly.

''But I bet your girlfriend will be waiting for you'', I smiled with a gentle high pitch laugh. It had been so long since I had laughed or even smiled.

''I haven't got one never have'', Jacob shrugged looking annoyed to the side. So Bella didn't advance on Jacobs feelings. Before I leave, I would make sure she was gone or there was hell to pay. Maybe she was still pulling him along?. How dare she!.

''Oh well that's strange, well, I have to go, nice speaking to you. I better go find a hotel. I hope you make someone happy one day', I picked up the back pack that I had dropped in front of the clearing. I had a few pairs of clean clothes, a toothbrush, hair brush and a pare of shoes. Not exactly a nice selection of clothes but it was a start.

''Not to sound stupid or anything...'', Jacob began but I naturally interrupted as usual.

''Because you don't always'', I shut my mouth up quickly.

''Do I know you?'', Jacob asked peering at my face.

''I've never been here in my life so I don't think so'', I lied again laughing and continued walking off.

''Wait!'', Jacob called from behind me. I hurried quicker trying to make my decision quickly. Should I stay a bit and suffer? Or should I just leave to make it easier for the both of us?. I would have to make the decision sooner or later but his face, his touch, his eyes. Can I run away from love forever?.

SweetHersheyKisses; x

(Read More!... )


	10. Chapter 9 Decision

SweetHersheyKisses;x

Chapter 9- Decision. 

(Still Leah's point of view)..

''Aren't you going to hear what I was about to say?'', Jacob shouted chasing me up and standing in front of me. Instead of walking around him like I should of done, I stopped and stared past him.

''Shoot'', I said out of memory, I still can't believe he can't recognise me. I said that all the time. Jacob winced rubbing his chest.

''You don't have anywhere to stay do you?'', Jacob asked taking a step back from me. So I was repulsive? Or just repelling?. For the past three years I had imagined myself coming back to meet him but this, I never planned for this.

''No I don't'', I said still imitating another persons voice.

''I have a friend that might be able to help you, his names Seth Clearwater and his family will take you in for a while, they've got a spare room'', Jacob stopped in thought, his eyes closed. So they were replacing old Leah? With fake Katie?. My heart burned around the edges. Was I not wanted anywhere?. I've spent years missing my family, just wishing they were near me.

''I'm sorry but I shouldn't be here, I'm sure _your _friends are nice people but I really don't think that's the right idea. I'm practically a _stranger _to them'', my voice strained, that hurt a lot to say that. Maybe I should come clean? But then why would I ruin Jacobs life?. He seemed to be hiding something and I couldn't help but want to be near him -he had my heart.

''Don't be silly, you can stay here as long as you like and I'm sure the Clearwaters will take you in for a while'' -Jacobs jerky smile lit his face, the same one he used to always show me, the smile I fell in love with, Maybe he recognised me!-''Katie''. My heart ripped, my teeth clenched. For all the hope I had allowed myself to feel, he thought I was this 'Katie'. I would of killed to of heard my name in his husky male voice, for too long I have waited and waited for him to find me but he never came. He didn't want me. The old Leah was showing through, I allowed that. I allowed a piece of the real me to show through -my sarcastic smile and defensive body posture. I blinked away the dwelling tears in my eyes and closed myself up. Your better than this, don't be a weakness in front of him Leah!, I thought over and over again. When I didn't speak, Jacob did.

''Common lets go, it will be okay'', Jacob put his hand on the back of my shoulder as a friendly gesture to help me through the forest. It wouldn't be okay Jacob!, don't you dare say that!, I'm Leah!, I screamed in my head. I allowed myself to be guided through the forest towards my house. Just one glimpse, just one, then I would leave when Jacob leaves. Just to make sure Seth was okay.

He lead me silently out of the forest and down the road past the La Push beach, past his house and down the long winding road towards my house. I could see it now, the house -my house.

Why did I have to come back?, this is going to kill me. I had made three years progress and just thrown it down the drain. Your weak Leah Clearwater!.

''See the house down the road. That's the house'', Jacob whispered next to my ear. His scent filled my nose making my heart wince. Memories flashed back through my mind. So many memories!. Like the old Leah would, I kept it together and kept quiet whilst I secretly broke inside.

A figure far away in the distance was dangling himself from a tree and back flipped towards the ground and continued to fall. I gasped.

''He's going to hurt himself!'', I shouted running towards my brother with a speed like no other human girl. It felt nice to feel the air whipping through my hair so fast. My hands started trembling. I would not change!. I gripped my hands into fists running closer towards Seth who was now laying on the ground moaning.

''Are you okay!?, you could of hurt yourself'', I knelt down beside him, controlling my trembling. I looked back over at Jacob who was still walking down the road.

''Leah?'', Seth whispered staring at me if I was a ghost.

''Ssh Seth its okay. Don't tell anyone. Not even Jacob'', I begged helping him sit up.

''You came back!'', Seth shouted trying to hug me, I pushed him back to the ground and pinned him down like I would when we were fighting.

''Listen you say anything to Jacob or to anyone else you're dead meat, now play along and say your hurt jerk'', I threatened in a low voice. Seth looked at me and nodded as Jacob walked up next to us.

''Owe!'', Seth moaned clutching his arm. Perfect, my brother was the best actor in the world.

''Are you okay?, my name's Katie and I saw you fall'', I acted out my part with a high pitched voice.

''I think I've just seen a voice. Is that Jacob standing there?. Of course it is. What could he possibly want now?, my forgiveness?'', Seth winced rolling his eyes. I nudged him secretly in the back with the hand I was using to support him up. He jumped a little.

''Listen Seth, I haven't been fair in the past three years but I'm sorry and would like to talk more about it but then I met Katie and she needs a place to stay'', Jacob began lifting Seth of the floor onto his feet. Seth hadn't changed in three years, accept get a little bit taller and muscular.

''We have an old room that she can stay in. She will feel as if she's lived here before'', Seth smiled at me. I kicked his foot when Jacob wasn't watching. He seemed troubled.

''I have to check on Billy now Seth and I'm sorry, real sorry but please make Katie comfortable and I will come by tomorrow'', Jacob grinned half-heartedly and started walking back down the road slowly.

''Thank you, it was nice to meet you'', I called after him staring at his back. I never knew how much it would hurt me to watch him walk away.

''No problem, it was nice to meet you too, see you tomorrow'', Jacob waved and started running down the road.

''So Leah, where the hell have you been!'', Seth grinned pulling me towards the front door. I hesitated and then let myself be dragged into the house.

''San Francisco'', I smiled quickly not telling him where in San Francisco.

''That's miles away!'', Seth shouted happily hugging me whilst slamming the front door. The house hadn't changed in the three years, accept a few family portraits had been nailed to the walls.

''I know but I had to get away'', I looked around our small living room and listened out for the familiar singing or whistling. That's when I saw her. My mother coming down the stairs with her hair bunched on top of her head wildly. Her clothes were baggy but comfortable for after work. Her eyes carried black bags and her skin creased with worry lines. She wasn't old -just a constant worrier. She was cradling a washing basket full of clothes and had my favourite apron on. Without looking our way she began to talk her soothing voice.

''Seth dinner is in a few minutes'', She continued to walk towards the kitchen.

''Hi mom'', I whispered. She stopped dropping the washing basket and turned her head. Her face had turned pale. Her eyes stared at me for a minute trying to reassure herself that I was actually there.

''Leah my baby!, she's home!, Oh honey!'', My mother cried out making her way towards me. I ran towards her with my arms stretched. I had missed her soothing voice and gentle comforting hugs. She embraced me into her arms.

''You came back to me!'', She cried, I flinched at her wet tears. I would soon have to leave -what would she do then?. I stiffened trying to pull out of her embrace.

''I came back to say hello'', I smiled tightly, in my head I said 'I shouldn't have come back at all'.

''Stay with us!, dinner is almost done and I always cook to much food, you know that!. Oh your beautiful hair!, its grown back lovely. Its down to your waist!'', She smiled touching my hair, caressing my face proudly.

''I know I started growing it again'', I smiled staring at the floor.

''Its beautiful, you are so beautiful. Now take your things upstairs and come back down for dinner'', She clapped happily kissing both of my cheeks before walking away in the kitchen. With my hands, I touched my cheeks staring after her.

''For mom's sake, stay for a few days'', Seth nudged me taking off my backpack for me and leading me up the stairs. In shock, I kept my hands on my cheeks walking with him like a robot. He lead me up the stairs to my bedroom, which was as I left it but neater. It looked like it had been recently polished and cleaned.

''Why is my room clean?'', I snapped out of robot mode and started picking up random pieces of my belongings. Seth ignored my question.

''She cried every night you know, she even started doing your laundry and cooking extra meals in case you came back'', Seth sat down on my small bed.

''It must have been hard for her'', I nodded gnawing on my lip.

''What about me?, I had to comfort her and give her zero information on her daughters disappearance. She has finally stopped crying'', Seth stood up angrily.

''I'm sorry'', I looked at the floor again, spotting one patch of dust. At least there was something that was still here when I wasn't.

''Sorry doesn't cover it. Now tell me where you went or I'm calling Jacob'', Seth threatened. I spotted the open window beside my bed, ready to run towards it.

SweetHersheyKisses; x

(READ MORE!, There's more! :D )


	11. Chapter 10 New Identity

**SweetHersheyKisses; x**

Chapter 10- New identity. 

''Seth, honestly, I don't know where about exactly, all I can say is I haven't exactly done things I am proud off and if you tell Jacob, I will leave without saying anything to mom'', I bluffed keeping secrets. How can I say I joined a gang? And fought away my fears by helping them get back respect?. I wasn't exactly fighting the law but I wasn't proud either.

''You wouldn't dare'', Seth blocked the window catching them in my eyes.

''I would if you tell Jacob but Seth the past is the past for a reason. Now are we going to eat or what?'', I smiled sarcastically, almost evilly, Seth was a sucker for blackmail.

''If you leave. I'm hunting you down Leah'', Seth threatened budging past me and down the stairs to dinner. It felt like normal around Seth now, secretly we would do anything for each other, but we clashed like anything, fighting was all we knew.

''Go for it!, hunt me down!. See like I care, you wont find me!'', I snorted walking slowly down the stairs as if I hadn't left at all. Seth couldn't find me, I know new strategies and new fighting skills. I was known in the gang world and to be feared. I was un-hunt-able, after all I was known as the wolf, which was part true of course.

''I hope you too aren't fighting'', Mom called up the stairs like normal. Everything was just too normal? -even though every time I thought of Jacob, that stabbing pain jetted around my heart. I loved him, but being close to him hurt me because in the end I would have to leave and he would be happier without me. If leaving cost me pain, I would pay it, Jacob deserved happiness. Should I see Jacob tomorrow and confess?, I thought wincing at the thought of his reactions. He would probably kill me or laugh in my face.

* * *

''Mom remember what I said, I'm not here. My names Katie okay?'', I looked at my loving mother sternly.

''Yes of course sweet pea, if you promise to come home tonight'', She winked hovering the front room in her own little world.

''Yes I said I would tonight'', I rolled my eyes spotting Seth.

''And you'', I squinted evilly at him.

''I promise, its like you never left or came back'', Seth put his feet up on the small handmade coffee table blocking my exit.

''Feet down from the table, mom just cleaned there'', I kicked his feet down and stormed off outside.

''Touchy isn't she after so long?'', Seth snorted, Mom ignored our sniggers and continued to clean. I stormed my way out of the house and into the front garden gripping my fists tight at my sides.

''Just who I hoped to see'', Jacob called running towards me. I cussed rolling my eyes before turning my face with a gentle fake smile. Even with my curly hair tied back in a pony tail of my head, he still didn't recognise me. I even attempted a little make-up today and he still didn't recognise me.

''I was just off for a walk'', I smiled walking away. Jacob must think this new 'Katie' is rude but I couldn't be bothered with pleasantries, I was Leah not Katie.

''May I join you?'', Jacob asked persuasive.

''Sure, I don't own the world'', I sniggered with a laugh. Jacob looked at me strangely for a minute. The continued silence carried on. I stopped in front of him.

''What?'', I shirked defensively.

''I'm sorry its just that someone I knew used to say that quite a bit and you remind me of her'', Jacob shrugged his shoulders. Well done Jacob!, you have officially moved up from first grade!. There's still hope in you yet, I almost laughed.

''Oh, sorry'', I shrugged walking away, Jacob followed.

''So where you walking too?'', Jacob asked questionably.

''Anywhere, I am taking in the sights'', I lied, I knew exactly where I was going -to see Bella.

''Well let me be your tour guide. La push beach is down the road. Fancy walking along the beach?'', He smiled warmly. Jacob was never this nice to me before. It showed how much he hated Leah and how much he liked Katie. Well he can't have Katie or Leah.

''Yeah why not'', I smiled turning around the other way, Jacob walked by my side slowly.

''So where do you come from?, if you don't mind me asking?'', He shuffled his feet a bit.

''San Francisco'', I lied again. So much lying in such little time. I hated lying.

''Oh that's nice. I bet you hate the weather here'', Jacob laughed crossing his arms as he walked.

''Actually I was brought up in a place like this'', I said excitedly and shut up blushing.

''Really?, that's cool'', Jacob laughed with a shy smile.

''I had a brother as well but he was a bit of a jerk, always getting into trouble'', I rolled my eyes thinking of Seth. Surely Jacob would recognise me?.

''Really?, sounds like someone I used to know'', Jacob laughed as if remembering. Its me you dumb ass!. Me!, you know the one you don't want, the one you are murdering inside!. I smiled falsely.

''That person have been a bit of a pain then, having a brother like mine. I know I was a bit of a pain, always arguing with my brother and getting back at him'', I hinted.

''Yeah she was a right pain in the ass'', Jacob laughed smiling. That stung, I recoiled like someone had just slapped me round the face.

''Oh I feel sorry for you, having a pain in the ass for a friend'', I laughed making my voice break.

''Nah, its her I feel sorry for'', Jacob rubbed his chest. I don't need your pity Jacob!, I couldn't bring myself to look at him.

''You speak of her like she's gone?, do you not see this friend any more?'', I asked instead of shouting at him and saying 'You talk about me as if I'm dead and your glad. How could you!'.

''I haven't seen her in three years but who can blame her, the weathers nasty here and I don't talk about her much'', Jacobs voice strained and broke. Did he hate me that much?.

''I'm sorry she's such a thorn in your side'', I said sympathetically, I couldn't help it.

''Every rose has its thorn'', Jacob shrugged pointing towards the sea. I almost gasped but held in the breath. If he meant that as in insult, I was going to push him into the La Push sea.

''I used to throw pebbles into an ocean like this'', I jogged down to the pebbles grabbing a handful and taking my anger out on the ocean.

''I used too with my old friend, its used to be rather relaxing'', Jacob had stopped a few feet away watching me with a wary face. At least he remembered something.

''Why don't you try it?. Its very therapeutic'', I shouted throwing a pebble into the ocean causing a splash to soak the bottom of my jeans. Jacob looked at me cautiously as if he was concentrating he stepped slowly onto the pebbles as if he was fighting a long term fear. I watched him walk slowly towards me with his hand over his heart and walking the speed of one of the older tribe members -now I mean old.

''Common Jacob this is fun!'', I shouted throwing a pebble into the ocean. Jacob stopped looking at me and then took a few steps back towards the way he came.

''What's wrong?'', I asked him looking around me alert.

''Nothing, its stupid'', Jacob shrugged one shoulder looking at the pebbles below his feet.

''Scared?'', I rose my eyebrows, almost egging him on. I couldn't help it. It felt like old times.

''Of course not'', Jacob strode down towards me with his fists trembling. Since when had a big wolf like him been scared of the sea?. He grabbed a hand full of pebbles with an amused smile he threw them into the ocean, I watched them ricochet of the waves and sink. I picked up some more pebbles and tried beating him distance. He laughed letting out a macho snort and quickly picked up some more pebbles throwing them into the Ocean. I fastened my pace picking up pebbles and throwing them. Jacob copied with an amused expression. We looked like children fighting over the waves, competing to be the winner. We both burst out laughing, I couldn't help but laugh my fierce proud laugh. Jacob laughed with me and stopped staring at me face, I stopped nervously staring back into his eyes. We stood for a minute staring until I broke the stare and threw my last pebble into the ocean.

''Such free fun, you can't get this from San Francisco'', I smiled, knowing that the only thing you can't get from San Francisco is my heart back!.

''I wouldn't trade this for the world, not that I'm a nature freak or anything'', Jacob laughed quietly staring at the ocean. So the ocean was better than me?, he would let me walk away?. I shouldn't of come!, your weak Leah, I said to myself kicking the pebble in with my foot, sneakily splashing Jacob with water.

''Oops!'', I laughed watching Jacobs bemused expression. He rolled his lips to the side, one of his eyebrows shot up in revenge. He bent down grabbing a hand full of water.

'Oh no, no!', I screamed with laughter and ran down the shore line watching Jacob try and keep the water in his hands. I tripped on a piece of wood landing on a few pebbles and not in the sea.

''I've got you now, ha ha!'', Jacob laughed running close to me then tripping on the plank of wood. He flew to the floor soaking himself with water. I burst out laughing, rolling round on the pebbles watching Jacob sit up with rat tail like hair.

''I wish I had my camera!'', I laughed until my ribs hurt.

''Take a snap out of this!'', Jacob lifted me up into his hands and walked into the water. I screamed like a girl and wriggled like a worm. He threw me into the water that I could never get cold in. bobbed up and down in the water, standing up quickly from under it to catch my breath. My hair had fallen out the pony tail and was drenched over my face.

''Now that's camera worthy'', Jacob winked brushing the hair out of my face. I stood still half in anger and in laughter. I splashed him, soaking his half dry side. I laughed evilly and tried to swim away before he could splash me but his hands caught my ankles and pulled me back, standing me in front of him so he could splash me. We splashed and splashed until we were both panting for breath.

''Okay okay, I surrender'', Jacob laughed holding his hands up into the air. I splashed him one more time and then made my way to the shore. Jacob followed me, striding out. I slipped on something hidden and landed face first in the water. I coughed and spluttered lifting my head above the water and tried embarrassingly to get up. Jacob hid a laugh and took hold of my arm and helped me up gently, I took his hand as he pulled me out the water.

''Thanks'', I mumbled but didn't let go of his hand. We laughed and then stared at each other. For one minute, I thought he knew who I was. His head bent forward. I panicked, making my heart accelerate. What was I supposed to do?. Stand there and let him kiss me? -and then have to leave with the gentle burns of his kisses?. His head moved closer, and closer. I could feel his breath touch my lips.

SweetHersheyKisses; x

(There's more.... Find out if they kiss!!, I've finished my Fan fiction now!, READ ON! x :P )


	12. Chapter 11 Remember me

SweetHersheyKisses; x

Chapter 11- Remember me.

(Still Leah's point of view).

Jacobs face was bending closer, closer, faster. I looked around me, still frozen for something, anything that could be a reason to not kiss him. It would only hurt more when I had to leave him.

''Wow!, look a flat pebble'', I said nervously moving out the way of his face. Jacob stopped embarrassed and rubbed his head with one hand confused. I picked up the flat pebble and skimmed it across the ocean and grinned innocently. Jacob smiled looking behind me nervously.

''Its freezing, we are going to freeze'', I lied breaking up the icy atmosphere.

''You can come and meet Billy if you like but he's probably busy preparing for his wedding. I will get you a towel whilst your there'', Jacob smiled looking straight at the floor looking flustered.

''Thanks'', I smiled, thinking about Billy. Billy was getting married?. Jacob pointed the way and I walked towards it, even though I already knew the way to the Black's house hold.

''So is this Billy your dad?'', I asked making small talk.

''Yeah, he's great'', Jacob led me down the road towards the small shack. Jacobs Volkswagen rabbit was sitting outside as was Billy's truck.

''Its a Volkswagen Rabbit right?'', I asked devilishly, he had already told me what it was and listened to him obsess over the rabbit. Whenever Bella wasn't in there sitting and watching him fix it up, I was helping him fix the engine or fighting with him about what to do inside the car.

''Yeah it is how do you know that?'', Jacob asked excited.

''A friend of mine has one, built it himself as well'', I laughed, did he still not get who I was?. He was struck on stupid, had three years done that to him?.

''Really?, wow your friend has taste. I built this one too, I had a little help though'', Jacob laughed stroking his car before leading us to the front door.

''Amazing, it looks exactly like my friends old one. I will have to tell him about it one day'', I smiled and looked at the rest of the house. It hadn't changed a bit, it was still the small comfortable shack it had once been. He opened the door -just like usual, he didn't bother to lock it.

''Billy!'', Jacob shouted down the small hallway. A tall thin brunette girl walked down the hall and greeted Jacob with a kiss on the cheek. Jealously, I looked away at the small love seat in the corner.

''Hello Allie, where's dad?'', Jacob asked her, I caught the annoyed tone in his voice and looked back at him.

''He is trying his suit on for tomorrow and I am off to stay around Emily and Sam's house, so I will see the best man and my future husband tomorrow, what happened to you by the way?'', She winked. For a woman of about forty, she looked good. She had plain features but cat like eyes. Her lips were big and heart shaped. Her olive coloured skin had a touch of sun kiss like my skin. She looked natural and glowy.

''We went for a swim'', Jacob winked at me.

''Sounds like fun, I better be off soon'', Allie finally looked at me..

''See you tomorrow but don't expect me to wear my suit'', Jacob laughed rolling his eyes.

''I hope you do, it suits you. I want to see both my guys in the chapel but who's this pretty girl?'', Allie asked looking me up and down appraisingly. She then looked over at one of the pack pictures on Billy's lopsided mantel pieces. I gulped hoping that she didn't recognise me. She shook the thought out of her head and smiled back at me.

''This is Katie, Katie this is my fathers fiancé Allie'', Jacob introduced us, I shook Allies hand.

''Hey Katie'', Allie smiled looking at my face.

''Hi Allie its nice to meet you'', I said nervously. Billy had managed to get a nice girl, she better be nice because Billy was a wonderful man.

''You too'', Allie smiled picking up a holiday case and a black garment bag. She winked at Jacob and left the Black house hold.

''You should be with your father not me, he's getting married after all'', I began to turn away but stopped when I heard the wheels of Billy's wheelchair.

''Now what do you think?'', Billy said from in front of us. I turned around looking down at the muscular long haired man in a black suit. His face hasn't changed, it had come more welcoming with older age. Billy was like a dad to me, his smiles always made me feel welcome but when he smiled up at me, he gave a suspicious look.

''You finally look like your ready'', Jacob nudged his fathers shoulder in a friendly way.

''I feel as if I'm finally dressed up ready for my funeral'', Billy laughed, that was the good thing about Billy, he was always was so humorous.

''Excuse my father, he always finds laughter out of everything. Dad this is Katie, Katie this is dad'', Jacob introduced us.

''Katie aye?'', Billy looked me up and down suspiciously looking over at the pack photo.

''Hi I'm Katie'', I laughed giving Billy a stern look.

''Its nice to see Jacob with someone instead of being so alone'', Billy looked up at me innocently stretching out his suit. I almost laughed at his tight blazer.

''Dad'', Jacob moaned poking his father.

''Poor Katie is going to freeze, why don't you get her a towel and shirt or something'', Billy smiled angelically at his son.

''I'll be right back'', Jacob laughed secretly making circular motions around his ear, poor Billy, he wasn't crazy -Just happy. We both remained silent until Jacob was out of the room.

''Jacob doesn't know its you does he?'', Billy looked up at me again with his dark lashes casting a shadow on his cheeks.

''No'', I said quickly.

''You're not going to tell him are you?'', Billy asked lifting his head to the left.

''No''.

''I hope you know what you're doing, If only you knew what he's going through'', Billy looked at me for a second as if I was a stranger.

''What...'', I began to ask but Jacob walked back into the room with a towel and a long white shirt that would fit like a dress on me.

''I got you a towel and a shirt, I know its not much but it will keep you warm if we sit by the fire'', Jacob handed me the towel and pointed down his narrow hall way to the bathroom.

''Thanks'', I nodded nervously walking past tutting Billy. I sneaked down the hall going into the bathroom and slamming it quietly. I leant against the door breathing slowly. What did Billy mean?, what was wrong with Jacob? -What if he told Jacob?. I panicked drying myself and putting on Jacobs shirt. It covered almost all of my thighs. I let my waist length hair stay where it was after towel drying it, leaving it hanging in loose curls over my shoulders. Nervously I walked out with just the white shirt on, leaving my clothes hanging in the bathroom. I was never usually nervous about walking around in hardly anything near Billy or Jacob but everything has changed, we are older and I was in love with Jacob. I walked out to wear Jacob was lulling on the sofa with his eyes almost closing. I had never seen Jacob look to drained, his eyes were droopy. Underneath his dark eyes were purple shadows from lack of sleep and his face looked a little pasty. This is the Jacob I fell in love with -the hair, the face, that to die for smile and the eyes that a girl can melt in. This used to be my Jacob but he could never be my Jacob, never -he was happy and he didn't want me. I would accept it sooner or later and find a way to break the imprint, like he said, I was thorn in his side. Jacob caught sight of me first staring at my wet hair and face, he gazed upon me like he had never seen anything like me before. I blushed sitting down on the love seat next to him.

''It suits you'', Jacob smiled turning his gaze onto Billy who was struggling to straighten his Blazer out and his flower pin. I laughed helping him adjust his buttons and pinning the lilly to his blazer.

''Thank you'', Billy smiled at me, it was so nice to be around someone so naturally comforting as Billy, ever since my dad died he had been a second father. Always helping out with his comforting presence -he always helped me out with being the only female wolf too.

''Lilies are my favourite flower, such pretty flowers'', I smiled at the lily pin and adjusted it one last time.

''Strange, I knew someone that loved lilies'', Jacob laughed from next to the love seat. I shared a look with Billy. How did he still not know!, it was obvious!.

''You knew someone with taste'', I turned around giving myself a cheeky smile.

''Yeah she had great taste'', Jacob gripped hold of the arm rest as if he was in pain. Billy shook his head at me and mouthed ''drop subject''. Did he hate me that much that he couldn't talk about me?. I nodded and sat down next to Jacob. It felt strange to be back in the same house I had grown up in, to be around Billy and near one of the most wisest tribe members.

''So, I better go. I don't want to disturb you on your wedding night. You guys should have fun'', I got up looking at both of the boys who were sitting in the exact same position as each other.

''Why don't you guys make my stag night something, perhaps play Cludeo or something?. I sense that is one of your favourite games'', Billy looked up at me innocently. I gave him an annoyed look and smiling at Jacob. Jacob was playing with one of the tattered pillows in thought.

''Sure why not?'', I challenged with a sarcastic smile.

''Then maybe we can eat some brownies and milk, because who doesn't love them'', Billy laughed trying to blow my cover. That was my favourite snack. Jacob looked up at Billy irritated, he reminded me of a mouse taunting himself in front of a cat, Jacob gave that same annoyed look the cat would get.

''Only kittens drink milk'', I laughed with welcoming smiles. Jacob looked between the both of us and then sniggered to himself.

''That's settled then, Jacob get the brownies and milk, we will set the board game'', Billy wheeled himself over to the small corner cupboard that Billy had handmade in the summer those many years ago and pulled out Cluedo. I sprawled across the tiny floor helping Billy out of his wheelchair and onto the floor so he could reach down and play with us.

''You're stronger than you used to be'', Billy noted starting to set the board out.

''I'm different than what I used to be'', I looked at Billy for a moment of hopelessness. Jacob walked through the door with a fruit bowl full of brownies and three glasses of milk pressed against his chest. Any normal person would ask how they managed to carry all of that in his arms but any wolf person would just shrug it off. I pretended I didn't see his entrance. We began playing Cluedo and stuffing brownies and drinking milk happily, I laughed until my lungs burnt around the edges. I caught Jacob watching me through the corner of my eye.

''So Billy are you excited about your wedding tomorrow?'', I asked biting into a brownie.

''I'm excited to be joined together with the one I love Katie, when you love someone you should tell them how much you love them and give them everything they deserve and more. I guess I'm just excited to be able to do that for her'', Billy looked at me with a straight face, his eyes, those wise story telling eyes told a different story completely. I made myself look away from those eyes.

''Seems nice, you being able to tell her you love her. Some people don't get the chance these days'', I nodded staring intently at the board. So far, I was winning -like usual.

''But then if you love someone you shouldn't run from them, you should stick by their side if you get what I mean Katie'', Billy patted my hand twice and picked up a question card. I kicked myself under the table. This was a bad idea, coming back here, pretending to be someone else. Billy would always do what was right.

''Dad, stop boring Katie with gobbledygook'', Jacob moaned taking his turn on the dice and then looking at me for my go.

''I don't mind but I think I have just won'', I grinned smiling and picking up the character card, I flipped it over in my hand and then looked at Jacob.

''Hello Mrs Peacock'', I laughed taking a sip out of my glass of milk.

''How did you do that?, only one person has ever beaten me at Cluedo'', Jacob sighed sadly. I laughed, yes Jacob they've just beaten you again!, ha!, Leah five million to one!.

''Luck I guess'', I shrugged staring at Billy who was staring at us, he shook his head at me.

''I better go, its been fun, I haven't played a game like that in a while'', I stood up the same time Jacob jumped up.

''Thank you Katie, for making my night fun. I hope to see you soon, perhaps tomorrow at the wedding?. I know this is pretty premature but Allies best friend has just fallen ill and can't fly here so, I guess I'm asking you to be the bridesmaid. I'm sure Allie will be delighted to have a bridesmaid'', Billy looked at us and then smiled innocently causing lines on his forehead.

''Bridesmaid'', I laughed making Jacob jump and rub his chest and look around the room. I hated dressing up as much as Jacob. I was a jeans and shirt girl or a combat girl not a girlie girl.

''We have a dress that will probably fit you actually, for my wedding present, would you?. Please?'', Billy begged. I knew how important it was for Billy for me to be there, I had grown up around him.

''Okay, It will be my pleasure'', I said through my tight lips. It wouldn't be bad, as long as the dress wasn't too horrible.

''Thank you'', Billy kissed my hand and winked. I peered at his face. What was he planning?.

''I will drive you to the Clearwaters'', Jacob smiled looking at me sympathetically.

''That's convenient, Allie is staying there tonight. Maybe Seth can come and stay here so he is not to out girled'', Billy was already packing away the board game. Jacob helped him up into his wheelchair when he was finished packing it up.

''Seth out girled?, hardly'', Jacob sniggered, I let out a small laugh and then shut my mouth.

(THERES MORE!!... 3 Click next chappy!)

SweetHersheyKisses; x


	13. Chapter 12 Big day

SweetHersheyKisses; x

Chapter 12 -Big day.

_Leah's point of view (STILL!)._

''Leah wakeup, you've got lots to do honey!'', My mothers voice called through the distance of my dream. I moaned opening my eyes. It was still dark outside, what time was it?.

''What time is it?'', I moaned opening my eyes.

''Seven but you've got to wash, do your hair and make up and then try on your dress and if it doesn't fit I have to adjust it'', My mother shook me awake when my eyes closed.

''Alright I'm up!'', I shouted chucking my legs out the side of my bed and sitting up.

''Good'', Mom smiled walking away. She already had rollers in her hair. I walked sleepily over to my bedroom mirror. My hair had gone wild and curly from washing it last night after Jacob dropped me off home. That was awkward, we only laughed and told jokes until we reached home. He smiled and said goodbye and quickly drove off as I got out of the car and told Seth. I looked exactly like a lion would, with a long curling mane. In a way, it was my style -wild and proud. I tied back my wild hair and got sleepily in the shower. I showered slowly, drying and put on some underwear and a robe.

''I'm getting married in a few hours'', Allie sang down the hallway. I rolled my eyes scrubbing my teeth hard with my toothbrush.

''Oh just the bridesmaid I wanted to speak to, now Leah, I've got to sort out your hair'', Allie smiled. I jumped staring at her.

''You know!?, who told you!?'', I shouted spiting tooth paste out into the sink and washing it quickly. I got into a defensive position. I could of crouched and sprung and ripped her head off but I didn't. She would keep quiet -or else.

''It isn't had to figure it out and your mother told me but I promise, I will keep it quiet'', She winked waving a pair of hair curlers in her hands. Well Jacob couldn't figure it out -perhaps he had regressed and got dumber with age. I smiled irritated and made my way out of the bathroom and let her lead me to my bedroom. I looked at my chest of draws at the displayed make up.

''Make up?'', I asked staring wide eyed at all the cosmetics stashed orderly over my draws.

''Yeah I thought I would do the whole lot considering you were an hour in the bathroom. We have two hours to get ready'', Allie clapped pushing me down onto the bed. I rolled my eyes and then smiled. Allie had put barrel curlers in my hair and then mini ones. I felt a pair of hot curling irons in my waist length hair and then an ocean full of hair spray wafted the room. I coughed watching Allies happy face and listening to her happy singing.

''I'm done with yours, would you like to do my hair?'', Allie asked looking as if she was trying to bond with me.

''I would love to'', I smiled taking the curling irons from her hands and starting to barrel curl her brunette hair. Once I was finished curling, I felt creative. I dug around in my desk for a box of random grips and slides to pin her hair up, Once I found it, I began separating the hair and then pinning it up to make her look as if she had a Roman like pin up. The bouncy curls co-operated and pinned together perfectly.

''Do you have a veil?'', I asked concentrating.

''Of course, how can you get married without one?'', She grinned making an excited noise. I sprayed her hair with hair spray. She looked beautiful, her bone structure was more defined as the loose layers lead round into a curly pin up.

''Wow, thank you. You're good'', Allie stared at her self in the mirror, grabbing my hand and pulling me towards the mirror. Half my hair was still in curlers, the bottom half hung in perfect ringlet curls.

''I will quickly do my make up and then yours'', Allie winked picking up a few cosmetics. I watched her apply a little foundation, concealer and a pale beige that enhanced her eye lids. She applied black mascara on her long eyelashes creating a black edgy look. She then added a little blush and lip stick. She was naturally beautiful.

''You look really pretty'', I complimented playing with her cosmetics.

''Not as pretty as you Leah, perhaps a smile will make you shine further. You carry about this scowl constantly as if to defend yourself. Just smile, you have a beautiful face'', Allie complimented me as if she had known me for years.

''I scowl?'', I rose my eyebrows at her.

''Yes but who can blame you, being the only female wolf must be annoying'', She winked brushing my side fringe out of the way and began applying make up to my face.

''So you know about that too?'', I said feeling a little irritated. She wouldn't know a thing, she hasn't lived the life I've tried years to run away from.

''I've known for three years and I know you more than you think, even though we haven't met before'', She frowned and then pulled one of my eye lids closed. I closed my eyes feeling her apply eye shadow and then a wet liquid eye liner glide along the top of my eyelash line. She repeated on the other eye.

''Just so you know, I'm not a wolf any more. I don't want to be'', I said waiting for her to finish my

right eye.

''I'm sorry you feel that way. Now lets do your blusher and lipstick and then sort out our dresses'', She spoke happily as if my negative words hadn't affected her. I guess she was one of those people that didn't get bothered -nothing would ruin Allies day. She quickly applied the blusher and kept smiling when she applied my lipstick.

''Now look at your beautiful face'', Allie pointed to my mirror. I walked over to the mirror staring at the stranger that was looking back at me. My skin looked natural, the blusher enhanced my cheek bones. My eyes were defined and cat like. My long black lashes curled and framed my eyes perfectly. My lips were my natural colour but looked more defined and heart shaped.

''I look pretty dam good for a change'', I laughed pointing at myself.

''See, positive energy will get you any where'', Allie took my hand leading me downstairs. I had never let anyone take my hand before, only Sam -look what happened to that. Sam, I thought thinking about seeing him. Where was he?, with Emily?, did he have kids?. Did he marry her?.

So many questions I wanted to know -what I should know.

''Wow!, you both look so gorgeous'', My mother hugged me and then Allie. We both smiled trying to go towards the small other room. Mom's shoulder length hair had been straightened and curved into her face to create layers. It was strange to see that my mother kept her short hair, the only reason why she cut it off short was to support me and make it seem like cutting my long hair off was fine. I loved my mom for that. Her face was also glowy and her lips had made small worry lines form.

''Now your dresses are both hanging up in the garment bags'', Mom pointed towards the black bags hanging up on random hooks which photos used to hang on.

''Lets see your dress then Allie'', I encouraged staring at one of the garment bags. She pulled out her long silk wedding dress and took her robe off. My mom helped it over her head carefully and done up the vintage buttons that ran down the back of her and stopped above her bottom. Her dress had lace down the bottom of the train and at the top. It reminded me of a beautiful princess dress. There was a long cream coloured ribbon that tied around the back into a bow. The front of the dress was plain with the lace but at the same time, looked like a run way models. Mom and I both commented on her dress and wished her the best of luck.

''Now Leah's dress'', Allie clapped happily staring intently at the black garment bag, she picked it up un-zipping it happily. I saw a flash of light green. She pulled it out quickly waving it in front of my face. It was strapless and chiffon, the top part was shaped like a love heart. It flowed down to the floor. The bottom of the dress flowed, it had lots of layers which were all the same length and touched the floor. It reminded me of an angels dress. A ribbon around the underneath of the breast line tied to the back of the dress in a bow to enhance your figure, it was another shade of green.

''Wow, its actually kind of pretty'', I said impressed.

''And earthy!. That's why I love it'', Allie smiled untying the ribbon and un-zipping the dress. I nervously took of my robe and lifted my hands up into the air. I felt the fragile material slip over my body. I looked down at myself whilst my mom tugged the ribbon into a tight bow and zipped up the back of the dress. It fit perfectly.

''I told you it would fit her perfectly Sue'', Allie laughed trying to lift her long dress up and put her high heel shoes on.

''I am just going to get ready, you both look stunning'', Mom walked off upstairs yawning. Poor mom, she looked as if my disappearance had affected her sleeping. I felt a pair of hands start taking out the rollers in my hair and pieces of curls fall heavily off my head and down my body.

''Your beautiful. Me and you are going to have the best day ever'', Allie winked a secret wink.

''Its your day, I'm just going to be your bridesmaid'', I smiled secretly trying to work out what they were planning.

Five minutes went by whilst we finished getting ready. Allie found a pair of green high heel shoes for me and a clutch purse -I take it she didn't come from La Push, we couldn't afford the stuff she had.

''Now do I look frumpy?'', Mom asked walking heavily down the stairs. She was wearing white trousers, a silk black top and high heels. She had a pearl necklace and matching earrings. In her hair was one of them black nets and feathers. I stifled a laugh.

''You look pretty mom, better than an apron any day'', I winked staring at all of us in the reflection of the front window.

''We all look amazing, Especially Allie'', I grinned feeling the affect of Allies happy emotions.

''We better take a few pictures and then hurry up. Seth will be here with the truck any minute'', mom picked up a camera. Allie put her arm around my waist. I wrapped my arm around her waist and smiled innocently. We posed and took more photos in the garden and in different parts of the house.

''Here's a girl that says she doesn't pose!'', mom laughed taking a few more snaps. I pouted a little winking. Mom caught me just as I posed. Allie pouted too, hugging me. Seth walked in the front door with a miserable tortured smile. He was wearing a black suit and a green tie. I laughed at him as he started laughing at me.

''Look at my babies, they are all grown up'', Mom sniffed wiping the underneath of her eyes with a tissue quickly.

''Well we can't be this age forever'', Seth whispered. We both blurted out laughing. It was true, we could age only when we wanted to or gave up being a wolf. My hair had grown and my body had changed because I had stopped. I was normal now -unless I lost control which I wont!.

''Lets go!, I'm getting married!'', Allie shouted handing me her veil. I clipped it in the back of her curls and watched the layers flow down her trail. She picked up her dress throwing me my bouquet, picking up her ginormic bouquet and ran towards the door.

''Seth, Leah, I want a picture of you two'', Mom called as we began racing to the door. We stopped sighed and hesitantly put our arms around each other. We grinned happily, waiting for the picture to be taken. Once the picture was taken we ran out of the door.

(JACOBS POINT OF VIEW!)

''Dad when are they going to get here?. I look ridiculous'', I moaned standing near the alter of the chapel playing with the flower pin and checking endlessly to see if I brought the rings or not.

''They are on their way according to Seth'', Billy was staring at his watch. I sighed standing still and humming to myself. The crowds had already poured in, the whole pack was here. I tried to avoid their gazes. Minutes flew by until the wedding march started playing. I sighed in relief as Allie walked in slowly. Behind Allie someone was hiding. I caught a glimpse of velvety brown curly hair. I tried looking behind Allie who was smiling at everyone. I moved secretly to the side trying to gaze at the shy figure. Something inside of me just had to see who that was, I was drawn in. Allie stopped at the end of the long red carpet and looked behind her revealing the girl standing behind her. It was _her -_the one that created mini volcanoes in my body. My heart stopped, had my world just been turned upside down?. Allie began walking again but the girl stood still waiting for her turn. She stood staring at the floor. Her eyes were dark, I knew that but I could imagine those eyes staring shyly around the room filled with secrecy and pride. She was tall and beautiful. I gazed at her as if she would disappear at any second. Her green dress suited her sun kissed skin. I couldn't help but think about touching her smooth curly hair, caressing her face and kissing her earthy lips. My heart thumped inside my chest. She began walking, my gaze followed her protectively. Allie had made her way up to the alter and was already waiting for that girl to join her. She looked around with her head held high walking slowly towards the alter with her pride smile. Everyone in the room was staring at her. She was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. I wanted her, I needed her. I rooted my feet to the ground to stop me from running towards her. That sudden power she had on me was like a spell. I had to shut my mouth with my hand. That's when she caught my gaze, she stared at me now, she was almost near me. Her eyes stared at me passionately as if she could look into my soul, she was waking me up. I felt myself burning up inside, my heart thumped loudly as the pain in my chest melted into happiness.

(LEAHS POINT OF VIEW!).

His eyes, those eyes. I melted into them walking slowly up the isle. I ignored Sam and the pack staring at me. They probably wondered who I was. Perhaps they knew, everyone seemed to. I tried to stop myself from thinking but that face, those eyes?. My heart was thumping loudly, I felt my cheeks blush. Even Allie was grinning at me as I walked up to her. I couldn't help but stare back at his face. He made my blood boil in my veins. He wakened emotions up in me that I hadn't felt in a while. His touch, Oh how I wanted him to touch me, embrace me. I took my loving gaze away from him. Leaving those eyes made me feel lonely. I stood the other side of the alter from him staring at the floor, then the flowers around us. His eyes were staring at my face, my heart told me that. I looked shyly at the floor remembering the darkness that swirled around me when I was away from him. I tore my eyes away from the floor and concentrated on the ceremony. I wanted to cry.

SweetHersheyKisses; x

(There is a VERY long chappy next, its the last one... It keeps switching point of view, so sorry if its confusing!.... My favourite chappy the next one! Please read and comment.)


	14. Chapter 13 Happy ending

SweetHersheyKisses; x

Chapter 13 -Happy beginning.

(Leah's point of view at first).

''I'm Mrs Allie Black!'', Allie shouted after kissing Billy. I was so absorbed in the ceremony I had no idea that it had finished. I looked at Allie sadly, I could never have that happiness. She turned to smile at me. I quickly smiled hugging her carefully trying not to rip our dresses.

''Congratulations'', I said as she hugged me again.

''You know, its not to late to have your happy ending you know'', Allie whispered into my ear pointing secretly at Jacob. I looked straight to the floor.

''Leah has no happy ending'', I whispered pulling out of the embrace. Crowds started to swarm up towards Allie and Billy, I ducked out into the crowd and made my way back down isle and out of the chapel doors. I stood outside still wondering what to do when a waiter walked past me.

''May I help you?'', he asked stopping to stare me twice over. Men, I cussed in my head. I was used to men staring at me hungrily, it was the only way I survived for the three years in the gang. I used my looks for an advantage to threaten.

''Um, no thanks I am just taking fresh air. My friend just got married'', I smiled looking away.

''Oh how nice'', He smiled and walked away. I stood out there for a few minutes until Seth came out of the doors. I was too late to run and hide behind one of the vases of flowers.

''There you are. Are you going to come back in and through to the reception bit?'', Seth pulled my arm and led me back into the chapel.

''Well do I have a choice'', I half smiled cheekily.

''Nope'', Seth grinned sarcastically.

(JACOBS POINT OF VIEW)

I searched for her like crazy, I had seen her run off down the isle after the ceremony. It had felt as if she was running away from me, it hurt more than death five times in a row. My eyes searched the hall. If only I was a wolf, I would be able to detect her easily. I sighed walking back into the reception room where everyone was chatting loudly. Billy and Allie were being hunted by the photographer. I found Seth easily, he was near the buffet table of food creating a pyramid full of food on his plate. A piece of brown hair caught my vision. I had found her. She was talking to a dark haired man -who was he?. Why did she look so scared?, confused?. I felt anger shoot up my body as I marched slowly towards them. I couldn't take my eyes of her as I walked forwards nearly bumping into people as I walked by. Just as I was getting closer she turned and walked away. My eyes followed her across the room where she hid under a canopy of silk and flowers next to the harp player. I found my feet slowing. She walked away from him, Good, I thought.

''Jacob the photographer needs you'', Billy called as I stared at the silk and flowers hiding her.

''Okay'', I turned walking up towards Billy.

''Katie'', Allie shouted towards the harp player. I watched as she walked towards us. She smiled at me and then looked straight to the floor. I had to take my eyes away from her, she would think I was weird or had a huge staring problem. The photographer lined us up and took a couple of photos. I stood next to the shy brown haired girl. She didn't look at me once. Her gaze stared forward.

''Big smile now best man'', The photographer broke my gaze. I turned my head and smiled weakly.

''One more time, now Katie and Jacob please smile, Billy lift your head up slightly'', the photographer instructed. I smiled my hardest smile and tried not to laugh as Billy tried to keep his head in the same position.

''Perfect'', The photographer looked up quickly and walked off taking pictures of crowds and people.

Billy started talking to Allie. Katie stood staring at the floor chewing her lip nervously. I turned about to say something to her, anything, just to hear her voice but she walked away.

(LEAHS POINT OF VIEW).

That was awkward, standing near him, hearing his name. Just thinking about him. Why did everything had to be so complicated and why was he staring at me. I sighed sipping a glass of champagne. I had been avoiding him for two hours and every guy in the room. What was with them gaping at me like that?.

''Lee, your up for the dance now'', Seth poked my arm making me jump out of my day dream.

''My what?'', I asked nervous.

''You gotta dance with the best man, I'm not doing it for you before you sarcastically ask me too'', Seth rolled his eyes smiling at a girl that walked past. Since when had my brother been brave enough to do that?. I screwed my face at the girl. She looked away, I couldn't help but see Seth as the little boy he used to be.

''Maybe I should run away for a few hours? Then come back?. I did last time'', I smiled innocently.

''No, I wouldn't miss this for the world'', Seth grinned pulling me towards the dance floor -towards him.

''No Seth no'', I moaned trying to tug myself away.

''Jacob she's all yours'', Seth pushed me towards Jacob, I tripped bumping into Jacob. His arms caught me quickly. He looked down at me questionably.

''Sorry'', I said looking at my feet.

''My fault'', Jacob excused.

''It was my fault, my feet'', I defended wishing I didn't use the attitude. I was still standing with Jacob holding my arms. His warm touch had goosebumps jump up my arms, I was tempted to wrap his arms around me and let the feeling flow around my body. We stood silently for a minute.

''You look nice'', Jacob whispered. I blushed looking up but past him.

''Thanks, you too'', I smiled catching a glimpse of his lips.

''Are you two going to dance or what?'', Allie asked, I hadn't realised a crowd had formed around us. I watched Allie spinning around Billy in his wheelchair, they looked so happy. Jacob took my arms, and my hand and smiled at me innocently. I stared at his face now, I couldn't help it. I stared until my eyes connected with his. Jacob began moving us around in a mini circle as we danced slowly. I could feel our hearts beating fast together, his breath secretly panting like mine. I had to tell him? But how?, how could I tell him that this was Leah?. He would throw me away like any other rubbish in from the street. That's all I had known for the last three years, deceit, betrayal and neglect. He like Katie, not Leah and I was Leah. I couldn't be two people forever. I couldn't help but project sorrow into my stare, he seemed to sense it too.

(JACOBS POINT OF VIEW!!! :P )

Her eyes, those eyes that were staring at me passionately, what had happened to the inner beauty of them?. I couldn't tell if she stared with hatred or regret?. I tried to keep strong, show her my burning intensity for her but her eyes. Was she afraid?. Should I tell her that everything is going to be okay?, should I wrap my arms around her and soothe her?. I wanted to, my heart wanted to but her eyes.

I half smiled taking my gaze from her eyes and staring at the flashing cameras and crowds. I spun her round un-expectedly and back in towards me. I winked, trying to find a way to soothe her. She smiled, the corners of her lips quivering into a grin. Crowds disbursed and began to dance. I looked back into her eyes again finding happiness and passion. She was perfect. Her heart thumped against mine, I could feel it running through her. Her cheeks were blushing angelically, I wanted to brush her cheeks and hold her to me forever. Embrace my arms around her and just love her.

_She would be happier without you Jacob, _my old words floated through my head making me jump a little. Something familiar about those eyes, that face, the laugh, the smile but what?.

(LEAHS POINT OF VIEW)

He's looking at me, he is actually giving me eye contact. His wink had left butterflies in my stomach. I need to tell him, if I don't tell him then its not fair, he can't have me when its not me. If he doesn't want me -which he probably wont- then I will leave and face my forever in pain. Jacob is better off without me, he always will be. Who was I?, I was Leah Clearwater, the pretend human ex werewolf, ex-Quilette member, ex best friend of 'Vampella' and ex fiancé of Sam. I was ex everything -un wanted was what I was.

_But if he did want me?._

That was a stupid thought, who does want me?, no one. I had been everything in my life, everything everyone wanted me to be. Now I was Leah, Gang member and known as the 'wolf' or 'grey wolf' -I was feared by the streets. I had spent most of my time in San Francisco or Port Angeles, I thought I would give Jacob a chance to come for me, to prove he wants me but he didn't. He never came.

(JACOBS POINT OF VIEW!)

Her?, I thought to myself thinking over hidden memories. I knew her?, how did I know her. The song was coming to a close, I needed an excuse to stay closer to her. I shook my head, if she's not Katie then who was she?. Of course she was Katie. Who would she be?, she can't just be 'her' or 'human girl'. The song was slowing down and stopped. She stopped abruptly, her body posture was tense, she avoided my gaze now.

''May I have this dance?'', a guys voice asked behind me. Her eyes widened before she turned with a cocky smile. I looked up at the tall dark haired dark suited man. Jealously I handed her over to him and stormed off keeping an eye on her in the distance. Her eyes followed me across the room helplessly. Her trembling fingers were lifted into the air as the man pulled her arms up into the air and began spinning her around the dance floor. Our eyes connected, she was scared. I stood still not knowing what to do, should I break it up or let them dance for the song and then demand her attention some how?. I couldn't be obsessive but her eyes showed fear, her body posture was tight but in control, only her hands shook.

''Jacob that was hilarious, I never knew you could dance. Did you take lessons?. Are you a ballerina?'', Seth slurred rather drunk from my side. I growled to quiet for him to hear.

''Seth haven't you drank enough?'', I moaned still not taking my eyes off her. The guy leaned closer towards her ear.

(LEAHS POINT OF VIEW)

''I knew I would find you wolf'', Carlos whispered into my ear. I had been tracking Carlos down for months. He was causing my gang quite a disturbance. He was a drunk and re covered drug addict that was after me because he wanted me dead or alive which was my choice. I told him, I would rather be dead. I swallowed the hard lump in my throat. I had to keep control, I couldn't turn into a wolf in front of friends and family. The pack would probably turn on me and destroy me.

''Like I said Carlos, your going to have to keep finding me or maybe next time I will find you and end it all'', I sniggered in his ear quietly.

''Now now, that's no way to treat the one that loves you dearly'', Carlos tightened the grip round my hands. It didn't even hurt.

''Loves me?, how much have you drunk tonight. I only feel pity for you. Nothing less nothing more'', I whispered into his ear smelling the pungent alcohol on his breath.

''I warn you to not be so vicious, it will be your fault if I beat you again wolf. Its always your fault'', He threatened in my ear. I smiled all around at everyone to cover it up.

''You beat me up, leave me to die because you couldn't take harsh words?. Wow, you are a creep or just an alcoholic'', I viciously stared at him. If only he knew it took only a few hours to heal the stab wounds and bruises. I swore revenge ever since, now, he was just letting himself walk into a trap. There was a pack of giant wolves around. I laughed.

''Say one bad word and I will be washing your mouth out with bleach'', He whispered into my ear, clenching hold of my fingers and bending them slightly.

''And what send me to bed without any dinner?'', I laughed low under my breath.

''No, I'm giving you the choice to save your friends wedding and your life or you can come with me now and you can live. Now are you going to do what's right?'', He slurred in my ear moving my body closer against him. I thought about it for a minute. I can't ruin Billy's wedding but would he kill me in a room full of people?. What could he do?. He was bluffing. Crowds were starting to go back to their seats now, the dance floor was getting emptier. I would have to make my decision quick with people around.

''Get stuffed'', I said in his ear about to walk away from him.

''You loose'', He whispered letting go of me. His fist pulled back coming fast at me, slaming me in the face. It struck me hard and painfully making me fly and land hard on the floor. A girl started screaming.

(JACOBS POINT OF VIEW!).

A girl was screaming. I jumped up, already trying to see through the crowds of people that had blocked my sight from her. I pushed through the crowd to were every one was running too. That's when I found her, on the floor with her hand shaking against her cheek. A fist sized red patch was on her cheek. Her hand was holding the cheek that the guy had punched her with. He was making his was towards her, I began pushing through the crowd. He punched her in the ribs whilst male waiters tried to grab him. More screams floated the air as she got winded to her feet cradling her ribs and face, her eyes were brave. I ran through the crowd smashing my fist into the guys Jaw. A snap sounded. He shouted loudly grabbing hold of his broken jaw -he had a knife in his hand.

Sam ran into the crowd putting a hand on my shoulder.

''Get of me traitor'', I growled at Sam. I hadn't realised I was violently trembling. The drunk was swaying side to side with the knife loosely in his hand, he would drop it soon. Waiters grabbed hold of his arms.

''Not here'', Sam threatened. I turned around catching eyes with Katie, she was looking at me helplessly as if she wanted to cry. I stared at her cheek, the red patch looked sore, she should be crying -any human would. Suddenly the drunk got free.

(LEAHS POINT OF VIEW)

It all happened so quick, instinctual. Carlos slipped free of the waiters arms running at me with the knife thrusting towards me. Jacob was too late, he reached out to grab him but missed catching empty air. I closed my eyes. Well, they would find out eventually, I sighed running towards the drunk.

''No!'', Jacob shouted turning around shaking. I ran full speed doging the lunge with the knife. I was too quick for any human. I grabbed the arm that held the knife. I used my fist to lunge into his shoulder blade. It cracked. With my elbow I came down on the top of his shoulder, causing him to out balance. I pulled his arms around his back knocking his knees to the floor. He fell quickly as the knife came free from his hands. With two of my fingers I pressed it into the vein on the neck to knock him out. I found the vein pushing it until the body went limp. I dropped his body straight to the floor. Screams around me began to fade when the knife was kicked across the room away from anyone. I stood panting trying to think of what to say, what to do. Everyone was silently staring at me shocked.

''I taught you that vein move all those years ago Leah. You had us fooled, its really you isn't it?'', Sam teasingly cussed from my side.

''Hey guys bet you was getting used to the silence'', I rolled my eyes kicking the drunk in the side.

''Leah?'', Jacob asked. I froze. I hate how everything crumbles.

(JACOBS POINT OF VIEW!)

''Leah?'', I asked again. It was her -the one that murdered me. She was home and I had fallen for her all over again. Why did she lie to me?, how could she lie to me?. Did she hate me?, was she trying to make a quick get away?. So many things whizzed around my mind. Everything was different, she had fixed my heart only to tear it apart. She came back as Katie not Leah. I felt as if I had betrayed her, showing affection to 'Katie', even though it was Leah. So many questions left unanswered. Seth knew, Billy knew, almost everyone knew. I denied she was here whilst all the time I was wishing she was happy without me. I thought it was easier to deny her being here so I didn't have to loose her all over again. I could feel myself breaking down. I had spent the last three years trying to get her out of my heart and head for her own good but she comes back.

''Jacob'', she whispered. I could hear it now, her own voice. I could see her own smile, her own eyes.

''Leah'', I whispered again trembling. She looked at me for a second, just one second and turned her face away from me.

''I'm sorry Billy'', She said to the crowd. I noticed my father staring at the both of us. Leah walked away through the crowd. Should I let her go?, what should I do?. My heart was running away, I'm in love with her.

(LEAHS POINT OF VIEW).

I ran through the crowd almost in tears, I spotted a door that led outside. It was getting darker now, and it was raining hard. That wouldn't stop me. Nothing would. I ran outside letting the rain soak my hair as I broke down crying. I slowly jogged unable to run and cry at the same time.

''Leah!'', A husky voice called. I knew that voice, I loved that voice.

''Leave me alone Jacob, I said leave me alone!'', I cried loudly.

''No I wont'', Jacob shouted grabbing my arm stopping me from running. I pulled my arms out and kicked my high heels off.

''Why didn't you come to me!. I wanted you to come for me!, why didn't you'', I shouted crying louder than ever, I had never cried so many tears before.

''Come for you?'', Jacob asked pulling me to a stop again.

''Forget it, its pathetic. I'm pathetic now I'm leaving. Let go of me now Jacob, I swear I will rip your throat out'', I lied and sobbed.

''No you wont because I came for you but you wasn't there'', Jacob turned my face around to face him.

''You came for me?'', I asked trembling.

''I searched three days straight, I thought you left me'', Jacobs hands found my face caressingly.

''but you gave up!. You had her!, you always had her!'', I sobbed louder and louder letting the rain wash down me.

''I thought you would be happier without me!, what was I supposed to do?. I thought you hated me or something. I've been living three years in pain. I thought you were better off without me!'', Jacob shouted looking torn.

''You know what you were better off without me because what have I done with my life?, what have I done?. I have run away from everything I ever loved. I've run from life, I've stopped living'', I sobbed trying to push him away from me.

''Leah, Leah!'', Jacob shouted as I kicked and pushed myself away from his arms.

''I shouldn't have come back, never!. Go back in to your life!, I'm not worth living'', I sobbed looking at his face.

''Never say that'', Jacob growled.

''Oh no?. Well I've said it. There, happy?. I'm officially breaking down. You love Katie not Leah even though I'm the same person. You can't have her if you can't have me!'', I sobbed as my voice strained, I weakly hit against his chest to push him away from me.

''Who says I don't want you'', Jacob brushed my wet hair out of my face.

''Shut up Jacob I'm fed up with your pity, all you've ever done is pity me. You've never wanted me, you've never shown one positive vibe. All you cared about was Bella. I'm just a settlement, you know, second best. Always was, always will be'', I pulled myself out of his hands. Jacob stared at me shocked. I started walking away, letting the rain wash down me. He was letting me walk away, letting my heart be broken. That's all I needed, I could move on healthily now.

''Leah, your dumb you know that'', Jacob shouted at me making me stop and turn around.

''Oh right so I'm dumb now?. Anything else you can say to break me completely'', I scowled blinking away rain and tears.

''You're dumb because you think I don't want you. You're dumb because you think I pity you, your dumb because, because!... I love you Leah!, you idiot!'', Jacob shouted at me with his arms out in the air looking at me hopelessly.

''Liar'', I snorted. Who could love me?.

''You've never been second class, you've grown up your whole life confused and alone. I don't know how you do it, but you are so confident, nothing gets you down. I love you for you Leah, always have done. Part of me denied it because you were happy or you seemed to be and I know we've imprinted'', Jacob smiled walking up to me. I began hitting him and pushing him away when he tried to put his arms around me. His words felt like a dream, I've waited three years for him to tell me that he loved me.

''Don't love me, break the imprint, be happy, forget me!. I'm nothing, I don't deserve you'', I cried hiting him one last time as he tried to fend of my hits. I sobbed leaning my head against his chest. My heart was moulding together, he was fixing it with his presence and for once in my life I was scared to take it, what would I do when it crumbled?. His hands cupped my face and stroked my hair.

''I wont be happy until I have you, we are meant to be together, the imprint tells us that'', Jacob kissed my forehead.

''I'll be vulnerable, I'll loose you or you'll leave me'', I begged looking up into his eyes.

''Everyone's vulnerable every once in a while, but you'll have me, I'll never leave you. I promise'', Jacob kissed my forehead. I closed my eyes feeling the dripping tears keep dripping. With my hands I cupped his face and pulling his face down to kiss me. His hot lips touched mine and pulsed together rhythmically. I broke the kiss quickly to say the three words that have flooded my thoughts for years, the words I was broken on repair and thought I could never say again or feel again. I had lost the ability to love but now, Jacob loved me, and I loved him.

''Jacob'', I said sobbing with laughter.

''Leah?'', Jacob smiled wiping my face and laughing as the rain made it worse.

''I love you'', I smiled again kissing his lip.

''Leah'', Jacob asked staring at me passionately.

''Yes?'', I asked grinning and sniffing at the same time.

''I love you too'', Jacob kissed me creating our own bubble of personal happiness.

SweetHersheyKisses; x

THANKS for all the comments, Please let me know what you think!, I worked hard on this!.


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